Hey everyone! I'm new here. I know labels shouldn't be that important, but I'm curious to see what you all think. I'm a 24 year old male, have only had girlfriends in the past, and currently have a girlfriend. I distinctly remember being 11 or 12 years old and having attractions toward some other males; this made me feel strange and I was questioning my sexuality, but never came to any conclusions. I've seriously questioned myself at several points in my life since then, but I've always known I am (at least) attracted to females. I was never able to convince myself that I could be considered bisexual because I've only encountered a handful of guys that I have strong attractions toward and feel pretty much nothing for the vast majority of males. Aside from that, on numerous occasions I have fantasized about having a female body and being with both males and females, but I generally don't doubt that I am a male and am satisfied with my body overall. I've also been attracted a few times to trans people (both ftm and mtf) and often to women who are fairly androgynous.
It seems to me like you're perhaps a little bit bi. You can be bisexual, but have a preference toward one sex most of the time. I don't know if you know much about the Kinsey scale and what not but if you don't you should look it up, because I think that could help you.
---------- Post added 8th Oct 2015 at 05:18 PM ---------- Thank you for that - it's an interesting scale, but I feel that it was designed more for measuring observable actions and I'm unsure how to apply it to myself since I've never acted upon any of my feelings. For example, levels 1 and 2 say "incidental" or "more than incidental", but I have had no actual incidents, just feelings. From 1-5 it says "ambisexual behavior", which I'm guessing is the same as bisexual? I guess I don't exactly know what is included in the umbrella term "bisexual" and don't know if I can apply it to myself.
I suppose I also feel like people wouldn't accept me as a bisexual since I haven't had any real physical encounters with the same sex and I'm currently in a relationship with a female.
First of all, to me you sound bisexual! Like bubbles said, it's definitely possible to be bisexual but have a preference for either sex. Having had strong attractions to guys in the past, in my opinion, definitely makes you "not straight", so if those attractions are lesser than the ones you feel to women, you may be a Kinsey 1 or 2! Secondly, the phrasing of the Kinsey scale can be confusing, but I don't believe that "incidentally homosexual" means that you have had homosexual "events" or "incidents" in your life. I believe it has more to do with attractions than sexual behaviours (because, after all, you can be gay without ever having had a sexual encounter with the same sex). In this case, I would interpret "incidentally homosexual" as someone who occasionally has homosexual thoughts/desires. Perhaps this interpretation would make you feel more comfortable placing yourself on the Kinsey scale? Finally, anyone who wouldn't accept you as bisexual for those two reasons you listed is not really someone who you want in your life. First of all, bisexuality is being attracted to both girls AND guys -- if you're dating a girl, that definitely fits the definition of bisexual. And like I said before, you can still be gay without ever having had a sexual encounter with the same sex. You can be gay even if you've had sex with the opposite sex! It all depends on how you feel inside, not on how you act. If you feel comfortable with the bisexual label, use it!
