A little background; I’m still trying to figure out my sexual orientation. I do not have experience with either gender. I grew up thinking I was straight for most of my life until I realized this probably not true at all. Since I thought I was straight my entire life, I flirted with guys. It never went anywhere of corse. Every time I come close to getting a boyfriend I back out, I find a problem with him and something tells me “no”. I am tired of doing this to myself and I feel ready to give into a different desire and give girls a shot, see if that works out better. My question is how do you flirt with a girl in normal everyday life? How do you meet girls? I can flirt with a girl, I have done it, but then I quickly realize she is straight and stop. Flirting with girls is just not something you can do with just any girl like it is with guys. How do you go about meeting women? I know, dating sites, gay bars or LGBTQ clubs or events, but because I am not out and still totally questioning, I am way too afraid to do any of that. I just wish it were normal to be able to meet a girl who likes girls anywhere, like it is with guys. How do you know a girl is gay and that it is okay to flirt with her? Finding out you have been flirting with a girl who is only into guys and later does not stop talking about guys is just the worst. What a waste.
I met women when I went out on evenings. But I don't visit gay bars that much. Mostly I met the girls at my normal environment for spending evenings, e.g. in bars, on partys, festivals,...often they were introduced to me by some mutual friends. When a girl caught my interest, I just tried flirting with her or payed for drinks. I nearly never knew before if the girl is bi/lesbian or not. But the best thing to find out is just flirting. When she flirts back it's cool, and if not, then you know at least that she isn't interested. Even if she likes girls, it doesn't necessarily mean that she is interested in you. So for that it's actually not so different from flirting with guys. Ofc it's annoying to find out that the girl is straight, but at least you tried it and maybe you have more luck the next time. So just go out, flirt and have fun
