I have been gay for a while now and for the most part I was fine but more recently i've been thinking, I think a bit too hard and started to think about how a few years ago I would have imagined myself with a wife/girl friend and that started to get me down to the point where I was constantly having suicidal thoughts; I eventually thought that perhaps I am bisexual, and thats the thing im not currently at least attracted to any females and im not sure if I am just trying to make myself bi when im not because I was so depressed and I don't want to get to that point again where my friend had to talk me out of my plans to commit suicide. I'm so stuck! :bang:
Hey, I'm really sorry to hear you feel this way. Why does being bisexual give you this kind of anxiety? Is it the uncertainty? I hope that you're okay. I'm not sure from your post why you think you might be bi too... because you said that in the past imagining having a wife or a girlfriend brought you down to even having suicidal thoughts. That makes me think that you are gay rather than bi, but I'm sorry if I didn't understand this properly, or there's something else that is making you think you might be bi.
HarveyH - If you currently aren't attracted to any females, then I doubt that you are bisexual - although that's ultimately something that only you can figure out. It's possible that thinking about having a girlfriend/wife reminds you that you are different from straight people and that makes you sad and depressed - a sort of mourning for a "normal" straight life. (Although let it be said - supposedly "normal" straight people have problems, too, and many many of them aren't happy, either.) If this is the case, I'd encourage you to watch some positive gay romance movies with happy endings, and reflect on how wonderful it is to be gay, and that you can get married to a man and have a family with him. It can be truly wonderful, especially in this day and age. Good luck, and hang in there.
