I'm really confused. I've given up trying to find a label for myself atm, but understanding what's going on with me would help me figure out what to do. Any advice would b highly appreciated. I developed feelings for a guy, although I considered myself a lesbian. The thing is, I enjoy kissing him and I like the attention from him, but the idea of having sex with him grosses me out. The idea of giving handjobs or blowjobs repels me, and so do penises in general. The questions are two: 1. What am I? 2. What should I do?
You sound like you could be biromantic homosexual, meaning you can develop romantic feelings for men or women, but you are only sexually attracted to women. For what you should do... well, I'm not really sure on that myself Sorry.
Hi there, hopefully I can give you some useful advice, because not too long along I was in a situation kinda similar to yours. When I first started to try and accept myself, I tried to desperately find a label for my sexuality, I tried to fit all of my experiences into different words and categories in order to feel happy again, but to no avail. I eventually realised that my narrow quest for identity actually made me feel just as miserable and confused as hiding my sexuality from everyone I knew did. For example, I would want to call myself 'gay' in order to feel like I had a 'proper' sexual identity, and sometimes I would feel pretty content with calling myself that, but then I would have the occasional (non-sexual) 'attraction' to a good-looking girl at work or something and this would send me spiraling into confusion again. Although these types of attractions were merely emotional (which I'm assuming is like the one you have with that guy you know + kissing and stuff), they made me doubt my sexuality, they made me ask myself whether I really was gay, etc and this seemingly endless cycle of confusion made me feel depressed and lonely. Eventually, after receiving a lot of useful advice on EC and talking to other members about related topics, I realised that to be honest, sexuality is so diverse, it is impossible to completely classify yourself into a certain group or category, as everybody's adoption of the identities 'gay', 'lesbain', 'bi', etc are entirely personal and so they should be So to answer your two questions... 1. What are you? Long story short. You are you! You are whatever your attractions determine you to be. If you feel that your lesbian feelings and emotional connection to that guy merits the label 'bisexual', then so be it. If on the other hand you do think you're still pretty much lesbian, I'd go for 'lesbian' if I were you. I'm not 100% gay, but I'm pretty much gay haha. 2. What should you do? Be yourself, respond accordingly. It doesn't matter whether you call yourself 'lesbian', 'bi', whatever. If you feel something towards someone, male or female, embrace it without judgement. I believe that's the best way to go. Adding too many labels and unnecessary thoughts into the mix just complicates the matter. Go further with him if one day you feel like it, however if the thought of penises, etc still grosses you out, just stick as you are and go with the flow P.S. I hope I cleared it up for you a bit. If you have any further questions, I'd be more than happy to answer them. Thanks, mrbuddha123 (&&&)
It sounds to me also that you may be biromantic homosexual. I myself identify most closely as homoromantic bisexual. I'm attracted to women on every level, and occasionally attracted to men emotionally and sexually, but not physically (I don't think guys are hot really). There are the rare guys that I have wanted a relationship with, but it is not often. Just give yourself as much time as you need. No rush to figure out a label. Do whatever feels right. Be true to yourself.
I'm the same. I use Homoflexible. Meaning for the most part gay, but you acknowledge that you can enjoy men on a certain level. maybe not in the same way you like women, but at least somewhat. Like, you aren't attracted enough to men to be Bisexual, but Homoflexible is like 90% gay with SOME select straight tendencies? Hopefully this helps
