Ive been so confused as of late. I feel like I chose to be gay. I hear all the time that its not a choice. For me I think it was. As a kid I did have crushes on girls but I would never do anything about it . I never had a gf or a date with a girl. I never had that motivation that my friends had to do anything to get laid. I never got an erection off of a woman unless I worked really hard at it. I would constantly get obsessive thoughts about being gay and that i wasnt attracted to girls like my friends. I became very anti gay trying to drive those thoughts away . I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder. The minute i said ok all this is because you are gay I started dating , and even lost my virginity to a guy. I felt better but every once in a while i backtrack and think to myself that a woman i just saw is pretty. So am I really gay? I am attracted to men but i also have that lingering thought that by chosing to be gay am I going to hell. I am a good person, basically i was driving myself into an anxiety disorder by fighting to be straight. Should I force myself to be straight since obviously i am bi but I have stronger attraction to men than women. I was told by choosing to be gay basically I am choosing to sin. Its also tough to call myself bi . I dont know what I am at this pt. Bottom line rather be with a man than a woman but dont want to go to hell for it.
Don't listen to any of those people. From what I've read, you're gay and that's that. You're not going to hell, and it's not a sin. While you do choose to act on same sex desires, as most of us do here, you did not choose to simply be this way. It's how you are.
You're not going to hell. It's as simple as that. You don't choose to be gay, either. You can choose to lie yourself and be with a woman if you want to, but you're going to end up deeply regretting it.
Thats how I feel too the obsessive thoughts was my true thoughts trying to break in as a teenager but i would fight against. I would not be happy with women obviously that was not meant to be otherwise I would have been attracted enough to date one .
There are tons of LGBT christians who don't abandon their faith and yet do not believe that homosexuality is a sin. If your faith is important to you, I'd recommend looking into some rebuttals of the notion that the bible forbids homosexuality on pain of hellfire. If you can develop a positive outlook on your sexuality, gay straight or bi, then it will matter less whether or not you're with men or women, and it might feel less burdensome.
Man, all I can say is be you. Sexuality is so much big than straight and gay. Who knows you could be gay, but to be honest you shouldn't be so worried about it. Just date who you date. No need to worry. You're not going to hell, I'm not religious, but I don't think being who you are entitles you are going to hell. If you get strung up on worrying if you're going to hell, you're going to miss out on the life you should be living.
The common idea that the Bible absolutely condemns homosexuals is actually very misleading and inaccurate. I recommend watching this video (assuming you follow the Bible. Sorry if that's wrong). It helped me a lot when I worried about going to hell for my orientation. [YOUTUBE]ezQjNJUSraY[/YOUTUBE]
i am a Christian as well, this site helped me in that it affirmed what i already knew in my heart and soul. WWW.Godmademegay.com go there and read, read, read, especially the letter to louise. hope this helps. (*hug*)
Being an atheist, I can't really speak to the religion aspect of this much. But as far as noticing that a woman is pretty. .. Being able to note beauty is not the same as feeling sexual attraction. I can appreciate the beauty of a flower or a sunset. Doesn't mean I want to have sex with either of them. I routinely compliment the women in my life on their appearance. It's polite, it makes them happy (and since they are my friends, I like making them happy) and makes for a more pleasant atmosphere all around. But I have absolutely zero interest in any kind of sexual or romantic relationship with them. Like who you like, love who you love, it makes for a happier life all around. Todd
you should do you, and let others worry about what they think. forget about hell, enjoy life, the now, while you can.
