1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Would you date someone with a disability?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Nelly1, Nov 13, 2015.

  1. Nelly1

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2015
    Messages:
    87
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Brighton
    Gender:
    Female
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I'm sorry I haven't been on here for months. I've become a lot sicker due to chronic illness, my bladder has stopped working as it should and my intestines are going into failure(lots of tubes and surgeries). I've been bed bound for a while, but hopefully I can start getting back some freedom again!

    Which all leads me on to my next question. Would you date someone with a disability, or commit to someone who you know is disabled?

    Be as honest as you like here, even with health disorders myself I would be weary about going into something you'd have to be thrown into like the realities of disabilities. I won't be offended or let myself get offended, either. What are your thoughts?
     
  2. Papagei

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 29, 2015
    Messages:
    31
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Maryland
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Yes, I would... but I also have my own health issues, and I know I wouldn't want someone to decide not to at least give me a chance for that reason alone. I'm not in a wheelchair (yet, anyway), but I'm 26 years old with both asthma (which used to be severe, with many, many hospitalizations) and psoriatic arthritis. So yes.. both psoriasis and arthritis. The psoriasis gives me confidence issues, for sure (though I feel very lucky at the same time, because I have it on maybe 3% of my body where some are literally covered with it), and the arthritis is controlled only by prednisone, which keeps me helplessly about 25-30 lbs overweight and has really just destroyed my body (stretch marks, thinned skin, moonface...), and methotrexate, which is, well... dangerous.

    And like... I get that it's probably a lot to ask someone to take on, but we all still deserve to be happy and find someone. I'm very sorry to hear about the issues you are having. :frowning2: No one should have to go through these things.

    So.. yes. I would date (and commit to) someone with disabilities, but I'm not sure my opinion is too helpful, as I have issues of my own.
     
  3. waternation

    waternation Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2015
    Messages:
    191
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sydney
    Well, it really depends what the disability is, I suppose.

    If it was something that was a physical disability, sure. Just maybe not to the extreme that it was like completely paralysing because I think that would be really hard. (I'm thinking of the Steven Hawking movie that I watched :icon_sad:slight_smile: It was so sad.

    It really just depends on the person, I could definitely fall for someone who had one.

    I'm really sorry to hear that you've been so unwell too :icon_sad: I hope that things start to get better. That sounds so hard to go through (*hug*) (*hug*)
     
  4. darkcomesoon

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 17, 2014
    Messages:
    1,359
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New Jersey
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Depends on the disability. I fall for people, not bodies, so it wouldn't be an issue in terms of having feelings for them. However, if it were something really 'high maintenance' (for lack of a better term) or painful, it would cause me too much stress and anxiety for it to be a healthy relationship. I don't handle illness well, nor am I am to watch my partner be in pain without significant distress.
     
  5. Nelly1

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2015
    Messages:
    87
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Brighton
    Gender:
    Female
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Thanks for your opinions, guys, it would be good to know a load of people's opinions. I suppose my illness is high maintenance. I'm hooked up to pumps and drainage bags 24 hours a day, I use a wheelchair and I'm in hospital a lot of the time. I think I would be comfortable dating someone with a disability if they could still have time for me, and if we could have a relationship beyond disability and medical organising. Everyone has a personality, and it's not usually defined by their physical capabilities.

    I see what you mean about the pain thing. Most people with a risibility to have some sort of chronic pain, but learn to live a life beyond it. But again, it's so much distress to see loved ones suffering, it is a big commitment. I think it just depends on both sides of the relationship.
     
  6. Charon

    Charon Guest

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2015
    Messages:
    220
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Mexico
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Not really.