Hey everyone Sorry a long read below. I might as well get to the point I have been questioning my sexuality for a few months now I have been through good and bad days. So were do I begin well I guess I can go all the way back to when I was 16 didn't take much notice of the women or men around me. Was very much more into my gameing. I was not popular kid at school and was not well treated by the male or female classmates had few great friends that was by my side all male but never wanted anything sexually from any of them just was into the friendship. I was also diagnosed with ADHD and a learning disability doctors said I was to stupide to make in it past reception dun know how they got that conclusion anyway. By the end of year 10 I saw a picture of a male modal could not avert my eyes for 15 seconds did not know what happened. after that I shrugged it off still took no notice of any one around me in a sexual manner. Then tafe began and now a new environment and the fantasizing of females had begun erections would come as I thought of them just in their swimwear or anything else revealing. But still did not take any notice of the women or males around me still. But started to question my sexual orientation when my classmates would always eye up women and I didn't. Mostly was loving the lesbian porn at this time also gameing was also a big part of my life as well. This continued for 4 more years but during that time I fell in love with reading mostly sci fi but then started to take notice of erotic stories mostly with female and male partners. I would imagine myself sometimes with the women character but mostly read them from an outsider point of view. Again tho I went for the women and women stories and really enjoyed those always had an erection. During this time lets say muscled males with no shirts would how I say this make me tight in the chest but that's it. Still fantasized about women. At the start of 2015 I actually fell into likeing furriers so yea weird I guess but still took no notice of any women or males around me at all. so was continuing with my life and then until 4 months ago lets just say my brain went um okay gay now. Without any warning what so ever. So I put it off as a weird thought but it has always been bugging me. Then one day I stopped getting turned on by straight or women and women porn. This devastated me I might not be a straight guy and I would not find love with a women. Now don't get me wrong I have nothing against gay people my step brother is gay but I'm just to insecure and frightened to ask about this subject. As he will probably tell my whole family by accident as he is not good with secretes and yes he is a open gay with a partner. Now until a week ago I started to try and watch male on male porn and I was not aroused in the way that I could not get an erection same as with looking at pictured of two male lovers and still was not aroused I even tried to imagine myself in the act and could not get my penis erected even if I tried. I even browsed through pictures of muscled male models I'm not sure what to feel I cant imagine myself being romantic with any of them and the tight chest did not happen. My eyes don't linger on them for more than 5 seconds tho I sometime purposely stare at them for a minute or more see if I can get aroused or feel anything I don't same with female pictures. . Tho if I really think about it and I could get semi erect will a male with me sometimes even a female but I really have to think about it. . I even went on YouTube and started looking at gay host YouTube channels to see if I could get information. mayby some of you know Gaygod anyway they did a kissing video and the first time a saw it I had that tight felling in my chest again but happened only once when I saw the video. I watched it again but nothing this time. I have gone to many gay test sites to see if I can find an answer but I cant. I'm at the point now that its really affecting me emotionally. So now I am here just looking for some answers and to see what a bisexual or a gay individual would think. Thanks for reading and answering. sorry for spelling mistakes not good a grammar.
sorry all paragraphs were deleted so yea here is a summary. I cant get aroused by women but have been looking at male on male porn and also not getting aroused. I get a tight feeling in the chest when I see two men kissing. I have a gay step brother but scared to ask but I don't hate gays I am not sure if I am one myself. I look at male module pictures to see if I get a strong response and I don't well I don't know what I feel really. I just need to know what a bisexual and gay individual thinks thanks.
Re: Confused as hell (last thread paragraph got deleted sorry) Sorry all last paragraph was accidently deleted I just need to know a few thing I don't know if I am gay, straight or bisexual this has been nagging me for a while now and I don't know what to do. I can get aroused by women so I wen to gay porn to see if I indeed liked men I could not get an erection. but some times I get a tight felling in my chest when I see 2 gay guys kissing. I used to watch mostly lesbian porn and get erections easy but recently I cant and I don't feel aroused by women. but then I look at men in porn or porn like pictures and an erection does not happen. If I really think about it I could get semi erect when imaging about a male or female but I really have to think about it. I just need some help from people who might be going through what I am going through. Thank you and sorry for the repost don't know how to delete.
sorry all ill do a reply paragraph my whole situation was deleted. Anyway I'm not sure if I am gay or not I am battling my own mind at the moment I cant get arouse my straight or lesbian porn now but I used to. Recently I tried looking at gay porn and I did not get an erection at all. But my own mind I'm still calling myself gay I look at naked males and I don't know what I feel I don't think about sleeping with them or anything. I grew up around people who say they always noticed beautiful women but I didn't. Now I am saying to myself I am gay but when I think about a man doing something sexual to me I don't really get an erection but if already erected it stays erected. I don't know anymore that's why I'm asking this community on their thought. thanks
Hi. I know it is frustrating when you just want to know who you are, but I think the best way for you to sort your head out is to take some pressure off. In your case it seems testing yourself with porn is only confusing you more. I want to suggest a different approach that worked for me. Next time you are out walking around in a busy area, make a mental note of where your eyes naturally wander, to guys or girls. It has to be natural though! It's by no means a confirmation, but it might help.
I think the best thing to do is relax. You don't have to decide now. Maybe sex just isn't turning you on as much and an emotional connection is what your after. I think thats totally normal. I think it would help you to get out of your head about it. It's cool how you think, your very analytical and digital minded, but for this I think you're over thinking it. Just give yourself permission to be in discovery mode, and know that your on an adventure and you may never be gay or straight. You may just fall in love with a person, and that's great too. Society puts so much pressure on deciding about your sexuality but that's not natural. Just keep thinking "without all the pressure, what would I be doing right now, who would I be enjoying, what would I be enjoying about them" and keep on gathering data. Your good at that
Sometimes it takes a while until you find yourself out. The only thing I knew during puberty was that I didn't object to become romantically engaged with another male while also having a romantic attraction to women. Just last year, I came to a final conclusion.
