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Question about fantasies

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Musician, Dec 17, 2015.

  1. Musician

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    Hey guys,

    I'm a male, 30 years old. I sometimes have fantasies about both men and women, but truthfully, when it comes to climax, I'm ONLY able to get off to women. Getting off to men doesn't feel right. Does this mean I'm straight?

    I have a theory that I'm fantasizing about men, but I'm not really present with it the way I am with women. I get aroused, but at climax, I have to turn it to women to finish.

    I'm guessing I'm straight, but I'm not sure.
     
  2. Feelunique

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    Maybe you just have some same sex curiosity. You have to decide. Not sure if you have done anything with the same sex or just a fantasy or arousal with porn. For me the not "feeling right" about it whether doing or watching it I used to feel young. I think it was the influence of society overriding my personal feelings that made me feel I did something bad because it was with another male.
     
  3. Vav

    Vav Guest

    I have a similar issue, but I'm female. I can climax thinking about being with a girl, I can climax thinking about gay male sex, but I can never climax imagining myself having straight sex. I still have a hard time understanding my sexuality. I guess I just don't like straight sex.
     
  4. kenb88

    kenb88 Guest

    Same for me, I feel disgusted afterwards, most of the time, especially when I consider what others would think... In the moment it feels very natural and arousing. After climax my mind doesn't stop racing.

    If you find yourself having these thoughts more often, chances are you'll eventually get off to guys as you discover what your deepest desires are. There's a lot of guilt and feelings of shame involved in the process. Personally I haven't done it with a guy but it seems like the only way out of these disturbing emotions. At least that's when you will learn who you are and what you want.

    Take care of yourself. These are really tough things to deal with, especially if you have no one to talk to.
     
  5. Musician

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    By "not feeling right", I mean my body has no intention of climaxing to a guy. Believe me, I've tried. But it only "goes" to a girl.
     
  6. Open Arms

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    That sounds bi or straight to me. A gay guy has no interest in fantasizing himself with a woman while climaxing (from my knowledge of gay men). If anything, it's kind of like UGH! ... a turnoff to them.
     
  7. pasinhose

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    It changes. I cannot visualize having sex with a woman now and really only get aroused when I see myself having sex with men. Wasn't always that way but it is now. Consistently. I think it has to do with real experiences you've had.
     
  8. bookandquill

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    For me, women are neither a turnon or a turnoff. They don't make me horny, nor will I get less horny by looking at them. They're about as sexy as a chair to me.
     
  9. dynamite9081

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    have you ever tried to climax while thinking of Men. It doesn't necessarily mean anything at first. but it'll give you the opportunity to explore you're feelings about it. I had a situation similar to you. I used to masturbate to men and women during my teen years and now it's mostly women. I used to be freaked out about the whole thing till I analyze my feelings. Sometimes fantasies are fantasies. i tried to act on my fantasies with men and it turned out I didn't like it at all.

    Try to analyze what you think about men specifically when you fantasizing about. that will prob help ou if you're honest with yourself
     
    #9 dynamite9081, Dec 19, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2015