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Any advice will be great

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Monak, Dec 26, 2015.

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  1. Monak

    Monak
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    I have been in relationship with a guy for about almost 2 years to be honest i love him and he loves me but we really fight alot and i find this relationship very unhealthy, i told him i am bisexual few months ago and he is not really taking it very well. Ill try to be short
    He was staying in my place for a while and now that he got bigger apartment i was expecting that he would plan to buy a bed for both of us so I can sleep over whenever I want. So when i went at his apartment to check it out he had only twin bed and I was like you should get bigger bed so I can sleepover he was like but i dont think It will fit in this room (no problem i will sleep on the floor if you come over to sleep) btw he has only one roommate and 4 rooms total. So I was like ok . Then i put him on reserve and one day after coming home after going out i told him you should sleep at home (because i went into a fight with my mom just because of this situation) and he got mad and he said what do you have on your mind and he went home. After that I broke up with him and I don't really know if i want to go back with him. Even if i will that means that I accept the way he is treating me and plus the thing is that I feel like i want to be with a women too and I cant really control that. So I download a app ****** and met a really nice girl still texting but the point is that I cant help it . I cant see my future without being with another girl nor without him. So how do I go out from this situation. I feel so stuck and unhappy that I cant breathe anymore it hurts. !
     
    #1 Monak, Dec 26, 2015
  2. Steve FS

    Steve FS
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    The initial moments after a breakup is the hardest, but if you truly feel like this relationship is not for the long run, then you've made a good decision for yourself.

    Your mind is going through loss, and just like with any loss, it'll take time to heal until you're fit again to be a part of another relationship.
     
    #2 Steve FS, Dec 26, 2015
  3. Monak

    Monak
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    I dont really know what to do I feel like I need him and I want him back but when i think straight I deeply know that that person haven treat me right the whole time and I havent feel loved the way a person in love should feel. He keep texting how my bisexuality is the main factor why we can not work out but that is just him he always attacks me just because he is so insecure
     
    #3 Monak, Dec 26, 2015
  4. PastelPancake

    PastelPancake
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    Hi Monak :3

    It sounds to me like it won't work out because he is too insecure. His insecurity seems to be leading to an unhealthy relationship.

    If he is treating you badly, I don't think it's wise to get back with him. You won't regret it in the long run.

    I'm here to talk if you want, okay?

    I hope this helped a little bit :3
     
    #4 PastelPancake, Dec 26, 2015
  5. Monak

    Monak
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    But its so hard I love him so much and its killing me that I have to stay apart from him but I guess thats the only way in this story.
     
    #5 Monak, Dec 26, 2015
  6. Distant Echo

    Distant Echo
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    It sounds like the only way he will be happy is if you back down on being bi. And he can't get a bigger bed? Really?
    Yeah. No.
    You're free of him. Stay that way. Look after yourself and spend some time figuring out this girl.
     
    #6 Distant Echo, Dec 26, 2015
  7. Monak

    Monak
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    Its so hard i have war with my self now trying to stay off of him. Relationships sucks
     
    #7 Monak, Dec 26, 2015
  8. Atreyo

    Atreyo Guest

    Your bisexuality changes nothing, and he should realize that. The fact you chose to be with him should speak volumes. I suggest talking with him and spilling everything you said here, minus maybe you talking to this girl.

    Who knows, he could turn around from his foolishness, or maybe he won't. But the only way to feel confident in whatever decision you go with, is to try to make him understand how you feel. If he does, and changes for the better, then you've got him back; if he doesn't, then you can feel more confident in leaving the relationship behind.
     
    #8 Atreyo, Dec 26, 2015
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 26, 2015
  9. Distant Echo

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    Honestly I can't see him changing his mind. I think he's looking for a way out, and he's using it as an excuse.
     
    #9 Distant Echo, Dec 26, 2015
  10. ShaiHulud

    ShaiHulud
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    Are you sure you are monogamous?
     
    #10 ShaiHulud, Dec 27, 2015
  11. Monak

    Monak
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    Well I am not monoghamous perhaps but who would you live like that. I cant hurt person like that being with two person at once and eitherway who would enroll or stay in a relationship like that? I feel like I am cursed
     
    #11 Monak, Dec 27, 2015
  12. Monak

    Monak
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    or I am just on the "turn".
     
    #12 Monak, Dec 27, 2015
  13. ShaiHulud

    ShaiHulud
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    Believe me i know many polygamist/polyamore couples and they are just fine, they love each other and live a normal life.
    This may not be your case, but we should start to realise that monogamy is as normal as poligamy, and that actually man/woman +kids relationships are pretty new, they started to be common with the rise of agriculture and domestication.
    I am personally monogamist but if you are poligamist or polyamore then you would be better to accept it soon, otherwise you will hurt yourself and those who would like to have a monogamist relationship with you.

    One of my best friends, a bisexual girl, is going on and off out of a heterosexual monogamist relationship although she loves her boyfriend, but she would like to share affection with other people, she admits that she is polyamore/polygamist but she is afraid her boyfriend won't accept this
     
    #13 ShaiHulud, Dec 27, 2015
  14. Monak

    Monak
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    I am not even attracted to polyamore people only monogamist. This is so messed up man.
     
    #14 Monak, Dec 27, 2015
  15. Monak

    Monak
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    Its like a limbo situation
     
    #15 Monak, Dec 27, 2015
  16. fly butterfly

    fly butterfly
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    You are doing all this again to the same guy from last time who is still with you and he is acting bad ?Come on darling...
     
    #16 fly butterfly, Dec 27, 2015
  17. Monak

    Monak
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    Doing what ?
     
    #17 Monak, Dec 27, 2015
  18. fly butterfly

    fly butterfly
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    Dear whats wrong with you both,what you are another romeo and juliet story? Come on you two are great couple you love him,he loves you if it wasnt like that you both would have been gone long time ago but you made it 2 yrs together.And now what you both gonna do you will be without him he will be without you whats wrong with you both

    ---------- Post added 27th Dec 2015 at 06:42 PM ----------

    Its about you guys you both have something special some energy!!
     
    #18 fly butterfly, Dec 27, 2015
  19. Irisviel

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    what's the point of dragging an unheanlthy relationship? Trying to maintain it would be living in denial. Better to break up sooner than when you need mental health care from all the stress.
     
    #19 Irisviel, Dec 27, 2015
  20. fly butterfly

    fly butterfly
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    If i understand good its not about healthy or not,she whants to go with girl,if she goes he will leave her and she doesnt want that and i think him too so you monak,you want him still by you in everything but would he stay? Idk what to say darling but it sounds like you have to make some choice in this situation :frowning2:

    ---------- Post added 28th Dec 2015 at 10:53 AM ----------

    The strangest love story i ever heard but its gonna be hard for both of you 2 yrs is not 2 days and all sounds like the true love story but in strange way,you maybe will separate but you both wont get off the shadow of eachother :frowning2: :frowning2:
     
    #20 fly butterfly, Dec 28, 2015
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