Just so we're clear: I'm panromantic and pansexual. That's not the issue here. What I'm struggling with is the lines between platonic and romantic attraction. I have a lot of trouble, when meeting new people, separating the two. Do I have a crush on them, or am I just excited about making a new friend? Maybe I think I like them because they give me compliments or make me feel good about myself? Do I just like the idea of being in a relationship with them? Ok so I think that person is pretty, but am I attracted to them or is this just aesthetic appreciation? The lines are so blurred for me and I know this is not an uncommon struggle, but I feel like this exceeds normal confusion into something that prevents me from entering a relationship at all. I've had crushes on people before, I suppose. One or two that I was absolutely certain involved romantic feelings. The problem is that when I compare those experiences to how i feel about other people, I end up with the conclusion that I must have had a crush on almost all my friends at some point. There's just not any difference between how I feel when I'm romantically interested in someone and how I feel about a friend I'm really excited about having made. Except for one really intense and long-lasting crush that didn't go anywhere, every time I've been interested in someone I've backed out as soon as they tried to initiate something. It just made me uncomfortable. And this makes me think that I either confused platonic feelings for romantic ones, or I'm so scared of being in a relationship that people showing that they're actually interested in me makes me immediately lose interest. Either way it's really obstructive and confusing and I just. I have no idea what to do. I'm 18 and I've never even been on a date and I'm honestly beginning to feel like there's something wrong with me
ok so this forum doesn't seem to be nearly as active as it was when I first joined, but I'd still really appreciate some feedback
