First, I say the asexual part because I do not experience sexual attraction upon seeing an attractive person. I don't 'feel' anything going to my core or a rush of excitement or anything like that. Furthermore, I'm honestly turned off by having sex with men. I mean imagining myself having sex with a man, I just can't do it. I wouldn't mind having sex with a woman, but even if I try to imagine myself doing so, I don't get sexually aroused. Next, I do find both women and men attractive. Not sexually attractive, but I can appreciate their good looks. As far as romance goes, I'd rather be cuddling and kissing a girl instead of a boy. I want to hold a girl's hand, be the shoulder for a girl to cry on, be a companion to a girl. I don't mind being friends with guys but I can't see myself being romantic with one. I'm guessing I'm more lesbian or homoromantic. But am I asexual? I do masturbate while reading smut, usually gay or straight smut. And that makes me think I'm not ace. I'm just confused with myself, to be honest.
If we are using the widely accepted definition of the word, no, what you describe is not consistent with asexuality. What you describe fits well within the spectrum of ordinary sexual arousal/attraction. You don't say how old you are; age can have an enormous impact on sex drive and attraction, particularly if you are in your teen years. Your description of attraction does tend to imply you are closer to lesbian than heterosexual. One last factor: if you are experiencing depression or anxiety, these can suppress sexual desire, and make it that much harder to figure things out. If that is the case, your best bet is to work on those issues first as they may help clarify your attraction and orientation.
Finding people attractive is something anyone with a brain and eyes can do. When you see an attractive person, do you feel the need to be with them, touch them, hold their attention even for just half a second? If so, that's what I consider attraction. If not, that's just acknowledgement of a person's aesthetic adherence to what you find appealing. The smut thing is irrelevant. That's just another story altogether, from what I've read. As for your reactions to sex. It really depends. I'm disgusted by the thought of sex with both men and women if I really think about it, but I see that just as an indication to my current mental state. Think more of the basic impulses you have towards attractive people: Do you want to physically, mentally, hold them/their attention? Do you feel the need to be as close and intimate as possible? If so, that may just be attraction that's waiting to happen.
I see what you're saying. And honestly I don't feel a need to hold hands/kiss/cuddle with someone unless I really know them. I mean attractiveness isn't the only important thing. I mean it's minimally important. Personality is the most important to me honestly. And I guess I only feel attracted romantically to people I actually know. I am 21 and I do have anxiety. I take medicine to deal with it and I have to talk to myself to calm myself down sometimes. That might be the case for me.
As far as I can see, there are a few possibilities: -You could be autochorissexual: Autochorissexual - Asexuals Wikia - Wikia -You could be demisexual: Demisexual - Asexuals Wikia - Wikia -Maybe something else altogether. I'm really not an expert, lol. -As for your romantic orientation, you could just be more attracted to girls. I find that biromanticism is fluid, as clique as that sounds. A good test that I use frequently is this--imagine yourself with a guy. What are you doing? If it's more romantic, that's a good clue that you're bi.
Holy crap, Autochorissexual is me exactly! That's probably me then. Homoromantic Autochorissexual. Thanks so much!!!
