Okay yeah so, I'm not good at this but I thought I was just a normal teenage girl when I started to fantasize about kissing one of my best friends. At first I was like,"Ew" and scolded myself, but then I felt more passionate about women ever since. The only thing I am scare of is I'm christian, like the girl who learns all the bible verses and has been to church every Sunday since she was born. I'm scared that if I am lesbian or bi, then my family will thing I'm terrible or even that I'll go to hell for it.
I'm sorry you're going through all this<3 But it's great that you've come to this site for help. Not only that, but that you've acknowledged to yourself that you have these feelings. That can be the hardest part. Even if you're still struggling to accept it, even just allowing yourself to see it is a very brave thing to do. Slow down. Relax. Take a deep breath. Don't worry about your family right now. What's most important first is that you accept yourself. These feelings of yours are true and real and pure and not sinful. There is absolutely nothing harmful or wrong about your feelings. The only "harm" that could come is if someone chooses to be harmed in some way by them, by not accepting them. But that is not something for you to take responsibility for. What you can do is learn to be happy with the way you are - trust me this is absolutely something you can do if you haven't yet. So first, just give yourself a pat on the back for coming here for help instead of burying these feelings. As for your religion, I'm Christian myself. When I was first questioning I really struggled with whether or not it was sinful until I saw this really helpful video. It's long, but I really recommend watching it if you have some spare time: [YOUTUBE]ezQjNJUSraY[/YOUTUBE] Maybe you can even show it to your family members down the road, but you don't need to worry about that right now. Don't stress yourself out too much, even though it can be hard not to. But remember we are all here for you. If you even want to chat, you can post a message on my wall (after you make 10 posts on the forum you can do this.) It may be hard for your family to accept, but people can absolutely change given time and patience. If you feel you could be in physical or emotional danger by coming out to your family while you're living at home (if you still are) then don't do it until you're out of the house because your safety comes first. But coming out is not something you need to do at all until you're ready. This is usually easier when you've accepted it yourself and feel like you're in a good environment to do so. If you have any friends who you know are accepting, maybe sharing your feelings with them could help, but it's absolutely nothing you need to do if you're not ready. It may seem like an awfully stressful situation and things take time, but it absolutely gets better. Being honest with yourself is the most important part, which you have already done and you should be proud of that. I wish you the best(&&&) ---------- Post added 18th Jan 2016 at 01:23 PM ---------- Also, labels are not important and can only add more stress. Sometimes words and defining labels can never describe the wide range of feelings a person can have, so don't stress out about exactly what label you might call yourself to others later on. That's not anywhere near as important as the feelings you do have and just accepting those as they come. It's okay to not have all the answers. Everyone's confused sometimes and labeling as questioning is certainly more than okay. You don't need a label at all. You could even come out as questioning if you wanted to! So don't stress and hang in there, it will all be okay(*hug*)
