1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

How to experiment?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by avenuequeues, Feb 12, 2016.

  1. avenuequeues

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2016
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    So I am 18 and have thought on and off for the past 5 years that I was bi/pan/something other than straight but also not fully gay. Over the last year or so I didn't experience much attraction to women so I decided it must have been a phase and that I was just straight after all. Recently, I went to a club and kissed some random guys - it was the first time I had ever kissed anyone and I didn't enjoy it all that much. The whole evening, I couldn't stop thinking that I wanted to kiss a girl instead. In fact, I often feel a bit like that when I am a bit drunk, maybe it's my true feelings coming through. Normally I am just a bit tipsy at a friend's house and I just feel that I want to be closer to my other female friends than I normally would, not kiss them or anything, but it's something anyway.

    Anyway, so after kissing those guys and not enjoying it, combined with wanting to kiss a girl, I've started to question again and I think the only way I'm going to get any kind of answer is to kiss both more guys and more girls. I do find guys attractive and am sexually attracted to them so I think maybe I just need to find more attractive guys to kiss, or actually date one who isn't someone I just met in a club. I am going out again soon and will try to find more attractive guys to kiss which hopefully shouldn't be too hard, but I don't know how to experiment with girls.

    I live in a fairly large city and I know there are gay bars/clubs here but I would feel a bit weird going to one. I don't know why but I feel like everyone that would go there would be way older than me as I'm only 18 (though I live in England where that is the legal drinking age). Ideally I would just like to meet women in normal clubs but I have no idea how to find out if they're straight or not. Going off only my one experience of going out, I basically didn't have any contact with other women there except talking to them in the toilets. The whole night seemed to be making eye contact with guys and attempting to kiss them/them attempting to kiss me. I have no idea where to begin finding queer women in a non-queer club!

    I know there are also other options which aren't clubs/bars but I'm not entirely sure what they are and again, I would be worried about being the youngest person. I'm also not really looking to meet queer women and form actual relationships with them necessarily, I just basically want to experiment with kissing and that's about it - if I enjoy that I will explore it more but for now that's really all I'm looking for. So I guess the other girl doesn't even necessarily have to be queer, just up for a bit of experimentation as well, just don't know how to find such girls!

    Does anyone have any advice?