I'm a 24-year-old male. Pretty much all my life, I never even thought about being gay, and didn't have any interest in men. I always knew that I was attracted to women, and yet my sexuality is confusing because even when I was in my teens, I was really aroused by the idea of the female form with male genitalia. As it stands now, I'm only attracted to women, trans women (pre-op/non-op) and "femboys" (I apologize if that's derogatory, but it's the best word I can think of to describe my attraction), which the latter I realized I'm attracted to more recently. Basically, I'm attracted to femininity and female-ish features, even if the person has male genitalia. I've never been in a relationship, and kinda hesitant about pursuing or being in one, to be honest, even though I'd like to if it can work. I seem to be favoring the more homosexual attraction more often. I have periods of time where I have a strong attraction towards trans women/femboys and women, in which the latter doesn't last as long as the former. As of the past year and a half, I've been self-identifying as bisexual to myself, and to some friends of mine, who've been accepting. But, labels aside, I'm posting this here for some perspective, to see if others can either relate or reassure me of what I'm experiencing isn't abnormal or a dysfunction, and perhaps some guidance on what to do about it.
I don't think that anything is abnormal. I certainly have never heard something similar but I don't think it should be something you should worry about. Everyones different and that's okay. Since there is an unlimited amount of genders then there's a to of different sexualities too. Maybe you just haven't found anyone yet and maybe that's why your worried. It's nothing to stress about.
I mean, I think I'd totally be fine with being bisexual, it's just that, my attraction to women used to be stronger, but it seems over time, I prefer and get off to trans women/femboys more often. I can still very much appreciate the female form as hot. The male form doesn't do anything for me, at least not the unquestionably masculine male form. Men who have feminine bodies and faces, on the other hand, drives me wild. That also comes to another problem, which is that, ideally I want to pursue relationships and act on what attracts me most. Since my strongest attraction is pretty specific, am I just setting myself up for disappointment or failure in finding a good relationship? I'm not even expecting like Victoria's Secret level hotness in either of my attractions.
Not abnormal, though perhaps a bit uncommon. I have a good friend with similar tastes to you (though he's primarily into ciswomen). My tastes are also somewhat similar - I'm very attracted to varying degrees of androgyny/people with features of both genders. I like femme women, effeminate men, tomboyish women, and genderqueer people. Purely-masculine guys do nothing for me. I don't think bisexual describes you very well, as bi people are attracted to men and women - you're attracted to female-presenting people. Pansexual fits you a bit better. Yes, you'll face some extra challenges in dating, but we're lucky enough to live in the time of online dating, which gives us far more options. You do need to be a bit careful because most binary trans people just want to be seen as the gender they are. However, there are lots of non-binary people out there too who are happy to be appreciated for the fact that they have features from both genders.
Hmmm, pansexual? I suppose that works. Again, I'm not that worried about what label to describe myself with so much as I am about dating and/or acting on my attractions. I'm not a fan of long-distance relationships, I want to meet/be with someone in my physical proximity. I'm skeptical of online dating, having been on ******* for a few years and just recently, had a girl from there I met in real life choose some guy in another state over me. That's kind of a longish story I don't necessarily want to get into right now, but basically, I was upset because it seems like we hit it off well, judging by what we connected on and her being vulnerable about things she isn't with most people. There aren't very many people in my area who fall under my main attraction, and those who do aren't my type, personality-wise. As for dealing with binary/non-binary stuff, I understand. I'm prepared to have those kinds of talks and agreements when the time comes. As I've said, people who can pass as female but have male genitalia is a huge turn on for me, so I'd want someone who is okay with that both in themselves and me.
