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new here and desperately in need for some help

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by RJmaybe92, Feb 29, 2016.

  1. RJmaybe92

    RJmaybe92 Guest

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    Questioning
    (I'm sorry if my English was not that good as it's not my native language)
    I'm 23 years old male . Recently i've started to feel something different towards guys. I've never ever had any feelings towards my gender . I'm really afraid that these feelings will continue . Don't get me wrong , i'm not a homophobic . But i just wanna stay in the normal zone for my family.
    My knowledge about these things is not that big , but i doubt that i am bi or gay . I mean isn't this something i should have known about it at a younger age !
    I'm not sure what's my question here but if anyone have been in such a situation , it would be great to share me his experience .
     
  2. RJmaybe92

    RJmaybe92 Guest

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    So i've been reading some of the recent posts here and it seems there are some people who realize they are gay later in life ! I still can't get how but it happens . But i also discovered something called HOCD and which might be my case in a way or another . So many thoughts and my head is about explode as it's hard to process all of these condradicted thoughts .
     
  3. Rhiannon666

    Regular Member

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    I know that it can feel overwhelming, especially when you haven't always known. It's totally normal for you to be feeling like this.

    I experienced the same, but I had a trigger crush: I met a girl and it was like a switch has flipped inside my head. I had never thought about girls in that way before, and like you, I was extremely confused, angry, and scared at the same time (as a matter of fact, I sometimes still am, but the intense feelings of 'I need to check to see if she's attractive' have mostly died down). I'm still a bit pissed of I'm experiencing this at 22, and not when I went through puberty. :slight_smile: I don't know if I just didn't discover this part of me early, or if my sexuality is just fluid. It might be comforting for you to check out the Kinsey scale; you'll see that people are rarely '100% straight' or '100% gay'.

    As for HOCD, as Chip has mentioned here various times before, HOCD in itself doesn't exist, but it is possible for someone to experience compulsive thoughts about their sexuality, or about deadly illnesses, etc. Most of the time, your OCD won't just be focussed on one topic, but it will be spread over different topics/obsessions (@Chip: sorry if I missed something, I tried my best!).

    I know this is all very confusing and scary, but you'll get there. There are countless people on this forum who have gone through the same, and who have turned out to be happy, fulfilled individuals. (*hug*)