Do Bisexuals always have a mental switch?

No, not always. I mean, I found out that I liked the same-sex at age 7 and opposite-sex at age 13 but since then it hasn't changed. I might go out with someone of a different sex to the previous person I went out with after a break up [not cheated], but that doesn't mean my mentality has changed.

 

If I were to look at how I experience bisexuality in terms of a switch, it wouldn't be one switch that is set either for men or for women. It would be two switches, and they seem to operate rather independently; at least one is usually on, and sometimes both. *wink*

I really had no idea the second switch existed until rather recently, although if I go far enough back in the memory bank, it was always there...

 

I've never experienced like the switch described here. I'm just attracted to a variety of people on the basis of characteristics that appeal to me. I respond to men and women (or whatever) differently, but it's consistent and not like there's something turning on/off.

 

Nope. No switches here.

I'm basically just attracted to cute people regardless of gender/sex. I tend to lean a little more toward guys, but I still see women as attractive on occasion. It's not like I'm attracted to men one day and women the next or anything.

 

No switch here, either. I'm attracted to both sexes, all the time. I am also monogamous, so one relationship at a time has always been my way. Zero desire to swing, etc.

 

I can't really say that I relate to the idea of a switch. Like some others above, I am simply attracted to people who attract me. Those are *most* often women, but also quite a few men...and it's not when a switch is on or off, but just when I happen to meet them.

Right now I haven't been with a man in what feels like forever. So yeah, that's on my mind. But that in no way shuts off any switch of interest in women (let alone my partner of 30 years).

And *sigh* I just feel a need to say to gypsy and adray that non-monogamy need not be about "swinging". Polyamory can be as much about commitment as monogamy is. It's just a commitment of a different type.

 

Just a quick question to the OP, since I've been curious since I saw this thread:

If you are bisexual, and the phenomenon doesn't apply to you, then isn't that enough to conclude that this phenomenon is not universal among bisexuals?

 

I think the 'switch bisexuals' are in the minority, but there definitely are very many people whose attractions work like that. It can be one day to the next almost a complete change.

I'm a bit confused about my sexuality, it's a bit all over the place sometimes. But I wouldn't say I have a switch, really. My sexuality certainly is fluid, though. For example, some days I can be more attracted to girls than other days. I feel like my attraction toward men is generally more stable... meh.

 

I would say the only switch I have is in who I'm trying to attract. With guys I wanna be the princess so I dress girly and wear makeup and use my male dominant tendencies as cute little quirks ex: playing Rap music while playing pool with a bunch of attractive guys and acting shy or embarrassed about the sexually explicit lyrics of my own music because "a pretty girl like me shouldn't listen to such things" [Yea my personality and thought process is playful and silly but this is how I really view things in my head]
And when I'm flirting or hanging out with guys I wait for them to open my door and if it's a group of friends and cute guys at a party I dance like a girl trying to seduce a man.
BUT when I have a crush on a girl I don't try to hide what I call my natural male dominance in my personality. I walk up make the first move. I compliment how pretty she is. I offer to buy her something to eat. I don't wear any "girly" make up even though I might have something on. I introduce her to my friends I give her a nickname. I offer to spend private time getting to know her. My whole mentality changes. I want her to be my princess.
So for me there is a noticeable switch depending on my relationship goals.

 

I have gone through mental switches before. I can relate, but don't know if all bisexuals are like that.

 

This is pretty interesting. In my daily coming and going, I pretty much only notice women, and sortof long for a "hot" one, (who can also fulfill my desire for emotional intimacy.

Then, as if from below, a more animalistic hunger can come over me and I need to masturbate over a man.

i can switch in an instant, though, and frequently have started masturbating with thoughts of men, and will switch if I want to get aroused in different way to women.

Probably not helpful, but thanks for the thought provoking post!

 

mmm I

---------- Post added 14th Mar 2016 at 08:38 PM ----------

mmm I think I can relate in the sense that some days I find myself thinking more about women and some days more about men. Sometimes that's just random but certainly if there is a certain someone in my life at any given time then that tends to be where my focus lays.

I too, can switch in the middle of masturbation at a moments notice. Can start or finish thinking of different genders or can change half way through etc.

 

I don't think there is a 'switch' per se (at least for me), in the sense that I am always attracted to both and that I never stop to be attracted to one but my attraction definitely varies, yes.

For example I am currently much more attracted to women and project myself much more with women. Does that mean I am not attracted to guys anymore ? No, I still find myself attract to them, I just don't care as much ( if that makes sense), A couple years/months ago it was the opposite and I was mostly into men, I always could acknowledge that both were attractive though, regardless of who I was most attracted to.
But yes I do tend to distance myself to the gender I am less attracted to at the time, but I guess it's a natural way not to get unwanted attention ? I don't know.

 

That is a good point. I was just expressing my own orientation and life. I respect that others are different and have very valid relationships such as polyamory.

 

I never experienced any kind of "switch". I find males and females attractive at any given time, it's never been any sort of "guys one day, ladies the next" kind of thing.

 

No switch. Who gets my attention is a matter of a person not the sex on any day.

 

I wish there were a switch! Sure, there are times when I favor men more than women, and vice versa, but there are also times I favor certain other traits, like ethnicity, age, and body type. It's not uncommon for me to experience certain crushes at a time, sometimes of totally "unrelated" types.