I lean towards women - I've known this for 4 years now. However, I can never so much as kiss a woman... so how do I control my feelings? How do I suppress them? I've gotten so many urges to act on these overwhelming feelings in the past few months and its driving me crazy. They are intensifying more every day and I'm worried I'll do something I'll regret - so please can you advise me, what can I do to stay strong and keep away from temptation? Being religious makes it difficult to do anything and I have no intention of every crossing the line - even though its all I dream about. Please can you help?
The very definition of a feeling is that you cannot really control them and attempts to suppress them usually end up making you feel even worse. If you find your emotions disturbing you could go an talk to a psychologist about them to find acceptance.
Hello, Perhaps don't think about what you don't want, and think about what you do want. I know this is really general advice, but I don't think I can help you any more than that because I'm not sure by what you've said whether this is something you want or if it's something you feel forced to want.
I can say I was feeling the same way... I've had feelings for girls since I was 16 or so but never had the nerve to act on. The fear of rejection, that final step... crossing that line and realizing I'm bisexual or lesbian. The urges and dreams drove me crazy too but denying or pushing those feelings away made them even stronger. It's hard to really control your feelings. Maybe instead of trying to control them look inside for the answer.
Thoughts and feelings . . . they happen. It's being human. But I think the real question is DO I ACT ON MY THOUGHTS / FEELINGS? And usually we have choices about that. I can choose to eat a small slice of that chocolate cake, or the whole cake. I can choose to workout tomorrow morning or not. I remember when I was first contemplating "exploring" stuff, I felt as though I was about to walk off a giant cliff into the great unknown. But that has to do with the context I think more than anything else. Do I debate on whether or not I should use the crosswalk or not? No, because unless there's a hellavulot of traffic or some other danger, I don't care and no one else really does either. If it didn't matter to anyone else if I kissed a guy or a girl, then it wouldn't matter if my urges (feelings) to explore were subtle or intense, no biggie. I could simply kiss and see if I got tingles or whatever The scary part is what I perceive to be the "consequences" to be, whether it's my own fear that I liked what I experienced, or how others might perceive me if they knew.
