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Confused and anxious! Plz help!

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by ms97, Mar 27, 2016.

  1. ms97

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    I'm biologically a male. Since the very beginning I was a little bit aroused by looking at penises, but I thought it was just comparison and also as the attraction was not so strong so I just ignored it. And yes I used to hate gay porn. But a few ew months ago, I tried anal masturbation and enjoyed gay porn. Even then I didn't question my sexuality but since the last week, I am having really strong feelings for a male colleague (almost like a crush). I almost started dating a guy. I am having extremely huge(almost irresistible) urge to make out and have sex with a guy. I continue to like women. Whenever I see a movie or TV, I first see the girl and the next moment I consciously TRY to get turned on by the guy. It's like I'm forcing myself to like men and enjoying it. I sometimes feel guilty and cried the entire night. Am I discovering my bisexuality? Or is it something else? All views are welcome but if someone bisexual answers it, it'd be great!
     
  2. bubbles123

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    I think you're stressing out right now because you're immediately trying to put a label on what you're feeling. You don't need to do that as that will just stress you out, and you're just starting to explore these things. Give it time and don't put pressure on yourself.
    Porn habits aren't always the best indicator for sexual orientation, but with what you described you could be attracted to this guy. Just give it time and see, and remember it's okay no matter what you find or if it takes you time to learn more about yourself. It's also okay to change your mind as you figure things out.
    Trust me, trying to see if you are attracted to every same sex person you see is the worst. I do that sometimes, used to do it a lot more. That won't help you because the only time you can truly know you're attracted to another person in most cases is when the attraction comes naturally, catches you off guard. Plus, people often are only attracted to certain people, so that can make it more confusing if you're overthinking it.
    Remember, putting a label on your orientation is not a requirement. Sexuality can be very complex. It's natural that you want to try to squeeze it all into a label right now to get rid of the uncertainty, but it doesn't seem like you're ready to do that at this stage so give it time.
    Good luck!
    Also, welcome to EC. It's great that you came here for help and any other questions you have, there are lots of people on here that can help you out.
     
  3. Ljjgood25016

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    You sound like you could be bisexual. I kinda know how you feel. I feel like if I made out with a guy, it would bring a spark. I like women too. I'm questioning my sexuality. I think I could be bisexual. I get turned on by women in lingerie. Sometimes, I get turned on by men who are only wearing their underwear. Sometimes, I feel like I'm forcing my attractions. If I were you, I would take it one day at a time.
     
  4. ms97

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    Thanks guys! Also I wanted to ask that does it occur that there are days or weeks when you are attracted mostly to men and other days when you are attracted only to women?
     
  5. funsized

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    It sounds like you could be bisexual. I am a bisexual and I felt the same way. Except I'm a female so I felt that way about females. It's ordinary (for some) to have those thoughts. I questioned my sexuality for a long time before I came out as bisexual. Having these thoughts recently may spark your curiosity. Experiment with your thoughts and expand your views. It may seem weird to you at first but if you really feel like you are bisexual then you should experiment. I am always a message away and can help you.
     
  6. Chinaski

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    I've understood that's perfectly normal when you're bisexual. When I was younger I was pretty much exclusively into people of the opposite sex but nowadays I seem to prefer and be more attracted to people of the same sex. It varies and it's seems to be different from person to person (for some it changes every day, others every week, month, year etc.).
     
  7. ms97

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    I seem to be attracted to genitals of the same sex. I am aroused by the thought of having sex with the same sex but I don't get aroused completely by checking out someone at a park (like I'm aroused looking at opposite sex). Is this the beginning of my bisexuality? Or am I assuming that I am bisexual?