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Issues with labels...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by clockworkfox, Apr 4, 2016.

  1. clockworkfox

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    More or less, I'm not struggling to label myself - just to feel more comfortable with certain labels.

    I like the term pansexual linguistically - it expands on the definition of bisexuality by severing the link between an attraction to multiple genders and the binary system. For a while I even labeled myself as pan.

    In the same vein, linguistically, bisexuality seems dated. By its classical definition, it means more or less the same thing as pansexuality - and of course it suggests a dichotomy, at the time it was coined the majority of the public didn't think of gender as anything but black and white.

    But I struggle to like the pansexual label on the whole because I've known multiple people that stress that they're attracted to ALL genders...even expressly stating that they choose to use pan over bi because they can be attracted to trans people too. I've even known a few people that seem to think that pansexuality is the only label that leaves room for an attraction to trans people?? Which is transphobic as hell, because it suggests otherness - that binary trans people aren't really their gender, because of the consequences of their birth. It's like I just hear, "gay/straight men/women can't be attracted to trans men/women because they (don't) have a penis!". In their defence, some people might be thinking specifically of non-binary or third gender individuals when they make statements like that, but even then, I read it as somewhat discriminatory, because many non-binary individuals carry and present themselves in many different ways, and all sorts of people can find them attractive.

    Also there's a trend to read bisexuality as being specifically an attraction to two genders, but I've never met a bisexual person that was only attracted to two genders? Like they literally all find attraction all over the spectrum. The only difference between them and the pansexuals I know is the choice of linguistics they use, and to a lesser degree, age - most people I know that prefer the bi label are 25+, while most people I know that prefer the pan label are <25.

    TL;DR, It really seems like Bi and Pan are the same thing, with pan being a linguistically updated version of the term bi, and I respect everyone's identity, but I want to know if my feelings of being "othered" by the Pan label are legitimate? Because it seems like a lot of people think of it as the only label inclusive of trans identities and something about that really bothers me.
     
    #1 clockworkfox, Apr 4, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2016
  2. HerrinDesFeuers

    Full Member

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    Location:
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    Note: The following is just my own opinion and how I personally feel about different labels. I don't claim that this is the only true definition and that everyone has to agree on it. I'm sorry if anyone is offended by anything I write, that's not my intention.
    The term bisexuality implies that a person is attracted to two genders/sexes, no matter if that's really the case or not. That's why I personally don't really like it for myself because it isn't and never was accurate.
    I identified as bisexual many years ago when I thought that every person is either male or female.
    When I learned that there are people who are neither male nor female and I heard the term pansexuality for the first time, that sounded better to me. Although bisexuality doesn't imply that the two genders/sexes have to be male and female, I felt that by identifying as bisexual I would ignore intersexual people and non-binary genders even though they would have been potential partners for me, too.
    I don't mind how other people label me and if someone says that I'm bisexual/biromantic, that's no problem for me since I stopped trying to put a label on me some years ago because I don't really need it for myself and to know "who I am". I sometimes use labels to describe myself because it's easier than explaining my preferences everytime. When I do that I use homosexual and panromantic because that's what describes my preferences best in my opinion and most people understand what I mean (at least most people in the lgbt community, and for most others a simple "lesbian" is enough).
     
    #2 HerrinDesFeuers, Apr 5, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 5, 2016