So I posted this a few days back but it ended up on a wrong section I'm not actually sure where this fits best. Partly here, partly elsewhere. Where is the psychological health section when it's needed. No really. I think it might come handy. Anyway to the point. Because I'm feeling lazy I'll just paste the original post below. "" I don't know how to start this. I'm writing this on school's toilet's floor. Well get to that later. I ques it started one and half months ago. I was on an internship in an advertising agency in order to complete my studies. I hadn't really enjoyed myself there. I got to do secondary work, collecting referenses and such. Anyway. One day I was feeling anxious at the office and it got so bad that I had to leave the office. I didn't tell anyone there, just left on the brink of crying and sat weeping quietly at the staircase. When I had calmed down a little I wen't to a park nearby in order to collect myself and then returned to the office. No-one had noticed that I've been gone, (It was 3 hours) Not too long and the same events repeated, and then a couple times more and I had been having some pretty nasty obtrusive so I had to take sick leave and see a psychiatric Nurse for 2 weeks. She thought that I'm fine and wished luck. I ended the intership and now I will complete it working at school which has been nice thus far and I've been seeing the school's psychologist. Today after seeing the psychologist I totally collapsed (mentally) I went to the most remote toilet on the school and burst to tears sitting on the floor. I don't know who I am anymore. I don't know my orientation. I don't know what I really like or enjoy. Right now I just want someone to hug me and say it's going to be okay but there's no-one to do it. Thank you in advance for anyone who reads through that, (*hug*) Sincerely - Foxer :help: "" I could have written that better & clearer but I was not capable of that at the time.
You seem like you're thinking a lot in your head ? What's causing your anxiety ? Why are you thinking so much ? It may help if you tell us more.
Well. Yes. I tend to think a lot in my head so that be true. Originally the anxiety started propably because I was feeling left alone at the office. Nobody really cared what I was doing and then we add the stressing work enviroment on top of that and that was it. I had pretty strong anxiety/panic attack and had to leave at the very moment. So that is what originally triggered it but now I'm pretty much unsure what is causing it. I'd say on the work place it was more panic attack kind and now it's strong anxiety from time to time. It has gotten so strong few times that I'd rather just be dead when it happens. And what really troubles me in this is that this is all new. It had never happened before the internship. Yesterday I had pretty fun day. Finished three posters for school and just overall had a blast doing them. Then when I got home and, uh. Well. Had some >.> *cough* me time. So after it I was feeling. I'm not actually sure what I was feeling. Nothing good that's for sure but I don't know. Quilt? Not quite. So anyway. I was feeling terrible but since my mum was at home didn't want cry because she gets overtly worried. Always does. The feeling lasted for ~40 mins and then I was just feeling tired. These^ feelings have occured on several occasions on different levels and I haven't figured out anything the situations/thoughts have in common. I mean its just. Really fucking troubling! I used to know myself real well but now I'm just feelig that I'm pretending to myseld that everything is ok.
