Hello, I am a 16 year old girl and I have recently come to the conclusion that I am gay! I’m not really sure how to explain this but I feel like I don't really belong in the LGBT community. It’s just feeling like LGBT people are a group of people separate from myself and not really a group of people I belong with? If that makes any sense at all?? I think this could be because I am only out (not even formally though) to one of my best friends and haven't mentioned it at all to anyone else and maybe I will feel more welcome in the community as soon as I do come out to more people. I'm not sure what actually to call this but i just get a feeling that like... I don't need to come out because there's no possible way I could be gay?? I know this is all over the place and probably nobody will be able to make enough sense of it to formulate some kind of response but there's really no other way I am able to explain it. Maybe like, I know in my brain that I'm gay but not in my heart and soul??? I don't know if this makes any sense to anyone at all, but if it does please give me any advice you can about accepting myself?? and if I'm alone or if anyone else feels/felt like this? Thank you
I can absolutely relate to the feelings you described. I'm still questioning things myself, but at the same time I find I completely doubt myself even when thinking about the same-sex attraction experiences I have had. It's tricky, and I probably couldn't provide the best advice since I'm still in the same boat too, but know that you're not alone! I think it's something that will take time. Also, to have an understanding/remind yourself that the LGBT+ community is made up of humans with such a vast variety of experiences pertaining to their identity. Some have faced a lot of discrimination, others not as much, some have taken a while to accept things, while others knew earlier in life. Some are more out, some are not. I think it's easy to look at a community like the LGBT+ community and compare yourself to what you see as "the universal LGBT+ experience" or other stereotypes within it. And also to remember that not being sure, or not having your experiences line up with somebody else's doesn't mean your feelings are wrong or invalid in any way, because your feelings are more real to you than they are to anybody else. So I hope this has helped a bit, even if I couldn't give very helpful advice Although I'd love to chat more. Once you make 10 posts, you can post messages on peoples' walls. Good luck in your journey!
I've honestly never even thought about what you mentioned because the LGBT+ community really does seem like one universal group and I guess it is hard to remember/realize all of the different people and different stories within. So thank you so much for bringing that to my attention because I think it will help me a lot. Thank you so much for all of your advice on the situation!! I'm wishing you the best as well!!
