Need advice...n love with her

Hi. So, I am in a place within my life that makes absolutely zero sense, yet at the same time it feels familiar. I am in my early 30's, have a child and married to a man and settling for what life has to give me.

However, I am in love with the most amazing woman I have ever met. Ah, the moment I saw her I instantly knew there was something about this woman I HAD to get to know. With this feeling, everything has changed in my life leaving me in a whirl wind with no one to talk to (I come from a judgmental family and again I am married).

Let me back up a few years ... Growing up I had an attraction to women but I "ignored" it or thought it was just a thing. I had the uncomfortable yet intriguing desire when invited to sleep overs. I always found myself indirectly flirting with the girls instead of guys in social settings. however, I did mention I was married so I have been with men. I have dated men, been sexual with men and am married to a man .. yet I have always felt like something was missing -- there was a void unfulfilled in my life. Sexually I spent most of the time acting like it was great sex (even when with my spouse which has been a long time ago now). I wouldn't ever orgasm with a man so I would have to finish my own business.

Then I met her ... and the world turned around. Actually, with her the entire world disappears. She's funny, beautiful, talented, independent, stubborn as hell, feisty, loving, caring, perfection really. Since the first time I met her, I have not stopped thinking about her .. first thought in my morning and last at night. I dream about her when sleeping all the time. I ache for her when I am not with her. A deep ache that I have never known. Everything with her is different yet seems so familiar. I have a comfort with her that I share with none other. She loves me back. We have shared our feelings and she feels the same. We are in love with each other and I am the married woman.

This now makes me question my sexuality. Once I figure myself out, what's next to accept and embrace me. I guess I feel like I am alone in this situation. No one knows about my feelings except her. I feel so confused about my self and I am the type of person who has everything figured out. Please help me make sense of what doesn't ....