I came to accept than I'm bisexual and interested in men this year. I started exploring dating websites and apps, talking to people but not finding a guy I really was excited to meet. I had a type that I've always been attracted to, basically fit or athletic cisgender gay men on the masculine side, which is how I could also describe myself. Through all these conversations and flirting, I've realized that's not my type at all. I finally started to come across guys who I was instantly physically attracted to, and seemed to connect some in conversation, and they are a different type than I expected to be interested in. The people I've been most excited to talk to have been FTM transgender, and I am not really sure why. It's not a sexual fetishization because in some cases I didn't even know until later in conversation. This will sound mean or close-minded, but anatomically it seems confusing and not particularly attractive sexually, and when I'm talking to these people I get other feelings that almost purely sexual attraction I had with other men I talked to. So now I'm very confused, maybe it's about sexuality, or simply preference? Is there something psychologically that has pulled me towards men who were formerly biological women? I also did some reading and it seems like the transgender community finds cisgender men that fetishization TG unappealing and seems them "chasers". I don't want to come across like that to anyone, it's completely not a fetish at all, but a strange coincidence that is confusing me. I know I also like women, so is this maybe a sign I'm not as into cisgender men as I thought? I haven't really noticed being into MTF at all. I don't understand my sexuality at the moment and I'm kinda bummed because I don't think I have a chance with the few people I've been attracted to. Just came here to vent, maybe someone understands this.
Trans men and cis men are all men, so this doesn't change your sexuality. It sounds like you just happen to have connected better with some trans men. Especially since you said a lot of them you didn't even know they were trans until you'd been talking to them a bit, I'd guess it's probably a coincidence. If you don't want to come across as a chaser, I'd recommend doing a bit of research so you have an understanding of transness and a grasp on basic terminology. Also, trans men are likely to be more comfortable around you if you don't treat them as if they are significantly different from cis men. Obviously, there are differences between dating cis men and dating trans men (trans men are likely to deal with dysphoria, trans men are likely to have different anatomy (although not all of them do), etc.), but ultimately they're still men. I don't think the fact that you haven't noticed yourself being interested in trans women is super significant. It's quite a coincidence that you've found so many trans men that you're into, but the trans population is pretty small, and often you can't tell someone is trans unless they tell you. You may have at some point been attracted to a woman you didn't know was trans, or you may not have met enough trans women to have happened to find one you were attracted to. Regardless, trans women and cis women are all women, so this doesn't change your sexuality either.
I certainly didn't mean to offend by misuse of any terminology, I actually avoided saying transmen because one particular person I've talked with defined themselves as non-binary. I have never actually addressed gender in any conversations with these people or treat them differently, I've only expressed that here because I don't have other places to make sense of my rambling thoughts. I have normal conversations about shared interests, as I would with any other man or woman. It's a peculiar coincidence that this keeps happening, I didn't know if anybody else had a similar experience. I certainly am not trying to think of them different than other males, my inexperience and ignorance with these things is certainly going to show. Again I apologize if I say anything remotely insulting or divisive, I'm trying to be respectful and I certainly haven't brought up these thoughts with anyone I've talked to.
