I don't know if this is going to help, but at least I can write it out and get it out there. I am a naturist and go to a nude beach. Today I went and I parked my stuff behind this guy who was a first-timer to the beach. He politely asked me if I could put suntan lotion on his back, which I did. I ended up talking to him and found myself immediately attracted to his personality/career/interests. I was also taken back a bit because there are very few instances in my life where I have found men attractive (once in a blue moon) and this guy was one of them. If I was straight I would consider him out of my league (muscular, athletic, very masculine). He was the most attractive guy to have ever flirted with me, I usually deflect it because I am not interested. We ended up having an immediate connection and he invited me to walk and talk with him where he complimented me a lot. Our conversation pretty quickly became sexual related and I was not entirely opposed to this although I kept saying to myself, "oh my gosh, I am a LESBIAN why am I flirting with this dude?" We kept laughing that we both met at this nude beach. How crazy is that? When we got back to our spot, he invited me to lay down with him. Remember, this is a nude beach and we were completely naked. We kept talking and he kept flirting with me. A few times I flirted back and indulged him. He really wanted to kiss me and I let him. Actually, we MADE OUT several times. I am still not sure how I feel about this but I didn't enjoy the actual action at all. He really liked my a** and kept complimenting me about my body, which I was surprisingly flattered by. I let him grope my ass, he wanted to go a bit further but we were at a public beach and too much touching is prohibited. It was also a good excuse to prevent him from touching me further. He made it pretty clear that he would bang me if he could but he came off as a great guy career/interest wise and we had what I would consider some pretty real conversations. He told me what he likes and I confessed that I like women as well (but I obviously didn't mention that I identify as a lesbian). I am so confused. I highly prefer sex with women, I don't really want to have sex with a man and I am not certain if I would want to try it and lose my gold star lesbian status. Life is short, I may even like it, but I fantasize about women! Then again he is a great guy and genuinely what I would look for in a partner. If we made babies together they would be beautiful babies. Uhhhhh what do I do? I'm not bisexual am I? This was such a rare and unexpected occurrence, I definitely did not see it coming. SO CONFUSED. Help. Oh by the way... I am dating a GIRL right now! SOS
1. I don't think you should care about gold star lesbian label. I feel that label is **sometimes used** to degrade people who didn't instantly know they were a lesbian until they had deeper dealings with men. 2. Just because you got along personality wise and had fun chatting. I wouldn't considered that sexual attraction. 3. There are guys that meet everything on your check list of what would be a good companion for you but the sexual connection that deeper connection will be missing. My guy friends I think are perfect...and I would even date them. But, that connection that is needed for something more is missing. 4. I think if you think this guy could potentially be good for you, you didn't mind the sexual advance he made...I would explore it. I wouldn't stop a potentially good things just because you have the label lesbian. Follow your heart and see if this is the right person for you. 5. Life is short...live your life to the fullest and without regret. If he is an amazing guy and you think there could be something more to it. Explore it and see where it leads. You owe no one an explanation about your sexuality. For all you know you're discovering something new about yourself... you might discover gender doesn't matter to you. 6. The issue with you already being involved. I think it comes down to what you believe cheating is. I wouldn't have sex with him if you are already involved with someone. But, might be good to continue talking to him and then deciding what to do next.
Thanks Seeking for your advice. This really helped me. It's a lot to think about and take in. I still don't feel like I fit into the bisexuality category but I am going to think about this guy for a good week and see what I think about him by the end of the week. I also want to note that I feel a lot of comfort identifying as a lesbian, anything other makes me feel uncomfortable. 6. I am not sexually involved or committed to the girl at all so there is no cheating (which I don't agree with).
