I'm out to a couple of friends as "not straight". i fluctuate between thinking i am bi and gay. I am not out to most people including some of my best friends and parents/family. but I really want to go to pride - but i don't want people to join the dots and think i'm gay...I am a little jealous (lol i know ugly feeling) that my straight friend is going but i can't ask to join because she'll know. I am also feeling a little sad, i met a woman a couple of days ago who i clocked as gay (and later was confirmed when she brought up pride), when i first saw her and locked eyes with her i literally did a little gasp. we were at an event with music and both in a nearly empty side room...we started dancing together, silly dancing but so connected, it felt really special...we went to dinner with mutual friends (same day we met/danced) and talked until 1 in the morning. and there she brought up pride and i couldn't physically tell her i liked women. i don't "look" like i like women at all but i think some gay people have picked up on it somehow before. i will never see her again because she lives very far away. i am gutted with myself because i couldn't say it and i really liked her. like really liked her. sorry for the vent, anyone any advice?
