There has been a few times with two of my different friends that I have obsessively wondered if I liked them more than a friend. I feel like deep down I know that I don't, but I continue to obsessively worry about it to the point where I will try to picture sexual situations with them. I don't like doing this and don't find it arousing, but I still do it to check if I will like it. Or stare at a picture of them to try to decide if I am attracted to them. I do this with other guys as well because I can't get past worrying if I'm attracted to guys. It's dumb, I know I am sexually attracted and romantically attracted to girls, which I won't go into because I already addressed it in my other posts. It went from worrying constantly that I was gay to sometimes wondering if I'm bi since I can't be gay since I like girls. Worrying about being bi is even more difficult because you can still like girls and be bi. I don't fantasize about guys unless I force myself to and don't enjoy it, but do like fantasizing about girls and find it very arousing. From what I have said does it sound like gay or bisexual behavior? Does it sound like an actual "crush" or same sex attraction or does it sound like I am overthinking and worrying about irrational thoughts? All inputs are extremely welcomed, thank you!!!
1) Stop worrying. Even if you were it wouldn't be anything wrong with it. 2) Why would you force yourself into fantasizing about guys if you clearly don't enjoy it? 3) From what you've described you're most probably not bi.
I know nothing is wrong with it, I've just never worried much about it until about a year ago and it has been a constant everyday worry. I force myself to fantasize about guys in order to check my reaction to the thoughts, it might not make sense, but that's why I do it. Same with gay porn which isn't often, but I'll watch it to check my reaction to it. I don't have those thoughts or watch gay porn for pleasure. I'm just worried I'll like it so I repeatedly test myself to see if I have a groinal reaction.
Hello. I noticed you posted several threads about being confused. Seems to me like you need a more personal insight for your anxiety. Maybe I can help. I helped one of my friends with this last year. Ask me any question and feel free to provide any background information. It sounds to me like you might be romantically interested in your male friends and that makes you wonder if you're also sexually attracted to them.
Well honestly I don't really feel romantically interested at all. I just worry that I'm sexually attracted to them or something. It doesn't really seem like I am but I still obsessively worry about it
It's Just sounds like you are forcing yourself to constantly test your sexuality to make sure it is still straight or whatever. My advice is just to relax. I don't know what your home situation is not how being LGBT would effect your life, but if you try to reduce your anxiety over checking all the time, it may go away. Try to refocus, if you feel yourself thinking about all this and wanting to check again, go and doing something preoccupying. Cook, read, play a video game. Don't do things like walking though, don't do them to relieve yourself anyway. You can think about anything while walking etc. That's my advice. XD Hope it helps.
Yeah, I am pretty much forcing myself too. It's like I start doubting myself so much that I have to check. My home life is good. It would be weird and different for me, but nobody would feel any different about me. It's just my lack of desire for any kind of relationship with a guy (sexual or romantic) that makes me think I'm being irrational and the thoughts do feel irrational because when I'm clear minded I feel like I can look at the situation and think it's silly and I'm definitely just straight. But then I always go back to doubting and obsessing and thinking that if I've been obsessing this long then it has to mean something, but at the same time it might not. I'm hoping it doesn't indicate anything, but don't wanna deny any part of myself at the same time. I've never been good with lying to myself so I wouldn't think I'd be in denial of anything but who knows. I sure dont
