Hello, im a 19 year old male who has been questioning his sexuality. In the past i have had multiple relationships with women and currently with my girlfriend of 2 years. I have always enjoyed hetero sex to the point where i crave it. Lately these feelings have disappeared and i have been focusing on the other sex. Most of my day is filled with thoughts of who i am I catch myself always looking at guys and girls trying to figure out which i like more and i have no idea. Ive tried on three separate occasions to watch gay porn and all three times i couldnt get aroused yet i watch straight porn or see a naked women and i cant control myself but i cant get these thoughts and questions out of my head. Ive been having gay fantasies but again nothing happens unlike when i have hetero fantasies. Its gotten to the point where its negatively impacting my relationship because my girlfriend knows something is wrong. In addition, this constant debate of gay or straight has started making me physically sick. These thoughts also give me anxiety around my friends which o havent experienced before too. I have no problem woth being gay but the uncertainty is killing me. Reading many coming out stories most people knew they were gay at an earlier age but i dont remeber anything like that. Am i in denial or is something else wrong?
Porn isn't always a good indicator, try not to rely on that too much. Best example is that a lot of lesbian women don't like lesbian porn. Also, there are a lot of people who don't discover their sexuality until later in life, not everyone knows from birth exactly who they are. Have you ever felt attraction to men? Also if you're still interested in women, don't forget that you might be bisexual - you don't have to give up women if you find you have an interest in men. If your girlfriend isn't homophobic/biphobic, you could tell her that you are currently questioning your sexuality and that's what is causing the shift in your behaviour, but make sure you also tell her that you are still attracted to her and don't want to leave her (if that's the case, of course). I hope this helps!
I have felt attraction to men before but as long as i could remember i was always interested in women. Most of my fantasies growing up have been about women but it was about 18 months ago when my first thoughts came up. Then they went away and periodically they come back and these last two weeks sexuality is all i could think about. I have never thought about my friends in a sexual way but lately im asking myself "is he attractive?" etc ---------- Post added 19th Aug 2016 at 06:37 AM ---------- Am i hiding my true feelings?
It sounds to me like you could be bisexual with a preference for women, or heterosexual with slight homosexual tendencies. Have you heard of the Kinsey scale? You can take a test for it here: Kinsey Scale Test It's an estimation of your attraction towards men and women. There are a couple issues with it (not taking into account gender-neutral people or asexuality, for example) but on the whole it's fairly accurate. It might help a little. As to whether you're hiding a deeper attraction to men or not, I can't really say. That's something that you will probably need to figure out yourself, since only you know how you feel and what you're thinking. I would guess that since you've never felt anything overwhelming for men and you are still very interested in women that you aren't 100% gay, but beyond that, I don't know. :/ Sorry that I can't be more help with it.
