Hi! I'm 16 years old and I've been questioning my sexuality for about a year now. For around the last month and a half I've been vaguely leaning towards the conclusion that I am bisexual. However, I'm still not entirely certain as (I find this quite difficult to explain I'm sorry) my last actual male crush was when I was 11/12. The thing is, of course I have found some men attractive, but I haven't had an actual crush on one. I hadn't had a crush on a specific person of either gender until recently when I went to a 4-week course and I met a girl who I had a tiny crush on. She was actually gay, but she didn't seem interested in me and I'm pretty sure she was already in a relationship lol. Also, since my feelings for her weren't heart-stopping or anything, I didn't really think about it too much and tried to ignore it as I didn't want to 'label' myself before I was absolutely certain. This is really embarrassing haha but I find myself aroused by sexual thoughts of men and slightly more so women. Recently, I spoke anonymously to someone about this and they provided me with advice which made me think that I am gay more than I am bi but I'm still very confused lolol! The problem for me is that I am still really unsure of my exact sexuality since I hardly ever have crushes on anyone and the last one was very minor. Also I am too scared to speak to anyone about it as I don't really have any close friends apart from one and my Dad is quite homophobic. I really want to meet, become friends with and discuss this topic with LGBTQ+ people of my age but I'm too scared to join my local LGBTQ+ youth group before I know for certain what my sexuality is. Thanks for reading this. :icon_bigg
Hey welcome to EC. All I can say is that I was in a similar position as you are in now. It is totally okay that you don't know yet. You are still young. We are all here to support you. There is no need to label yourself if you are still unsure. Just take time to explore how you feel. It is perfectly fine to be confused. From what you said it is likely that you are attracted to both men and women. ---------- Post added 4th Sep 2016 at 05:49 PM ---------- Or at least you might be.
Hi, I am in the exact same position as you! I feel aroused by both genders (maybe girls slightly more!) and I know it's really hard to decipher your feelings. Labels can be scary too, and I'm the same in the way I don't want to label myself until I'm certain. From what I understand, I think it's best to try and relax (which I still struggle to do and is easier said than done!) and let our natural thoughts flow. You're great no matter what, and it's likely you will develop a crush naturally in the future so don't worry about not liking anyone, I think that will happen when it's meant to naturally! What I'm trying to do is not to force it and let my feelings be. I hope you haven't been stressing about it too much! I understand it's hard not knowing and feeling so uncertain. I can offer my solidarity and let you know I'm just as confused as you are so we're in the same boat! Good luck, and try not to loose any sleep! The answer will come eventually!
