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Confused with romance and/or sex

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by johniscloseted, Sep 9, 2016.

  1. johniscloseted

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Nowhere land, or whatever
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    A year ago, when I started investigating about the LGBT+ community, I discovered I was bisexual and felt that was fitting for me, but I have some doubts.

    I have had some relationships with both boys and girls, but whenever I made out with any of them, the only feeling I felt was boredom. The first two boys I 'dated' were not really a crush of mine or anything, and the first girl was neither, so I thought it was a matter of me making out with them without feeling attraction. But then I had this short-term relationship with a boy I liked, and even though I was excited to be with him, when we kissed I didn't feel much either.

    I'm still confused because I didn't have strong feelings for any of them, and I cannot tell if that's the reason. I have had strong feelings for a guy, so I am mostly sure I am not aromantic, but since I haven't been physically close with him I can't know how I'd feel.

    I do like thinking of being physically close with people I like or have feelings for, and I am not disgusted by cuddling or kissing or any other romantic actions; but whenever they happen I don't feel anything. As I said I don't know if it would happen with people I'm romantically interested in, so I cannot say I wouldn't feel the same.

    This has been stressing me out a little cause I do feel sexual and romantic attraction, but whenever something sexual or romantic happens between me and somebody else I don't get any feeling.

    Want to thank anyone who takes time to answer because I'm sure any replies will help me ^^'
     
  2. SystemGlitch

    Full Member

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    It comes across to me that maybe you haven't found the right person yet. Not everyone will enjoy sex with everybody, and if you do feel that desire to be sexual it could just be that you would prefer it with more "relationship" and feelings thrown into the mix rather than being casual, if that makes sense. :slight_smile:
     
  3. johniscloseted

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2016
    Messages:
    5
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    Location:
    Nowhere land, or whatever
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    For a while I thought I might be demisexual, but from what I know demisexual people do not experience sexual attraction until they're close to a person (if I'm wrong please correct me), and that doesn't work for me since I do feel sexually attracted by people I don't have a close relationship with. I feel I am somewhere in the demi scale but I don't know :frowning2:

    Thanks for your help though :slight_smile: