Hello! I wasn't sure if I was gonna post this but I figured I might as well just do it .. For the past 2 or 3 years, I’ve been questioning my sexuality. Before that I never asked myself if I was gay until people in my environment started to think this. For example there was this time were I heard someone talk about me in class saying that I’m feminine. Another time someone told me that my brother once said that he thought I’m gonna turn out to be gay. My mom has also given me a few hints that she thinks I’m gay. So I started to think to myself ‘Am I?’ I know I’m not the most manly guy out there. I dress like a normal guy and all, but pretty much all of my friends are girls, my taste in music or movies/TV shows are also kind of feminine and I feel like the way I act or talk could possibly be pretty gay sometimes and while I know those things don’t define your sexuality, I’m still thinking about those things. I’ve had some girlfriends in the past, but nothing serious at all and my first kiss was pretty awkward and I felt absolutely nothing. I’ve never really been in love with someone or had a crush on a girl or a guy. I can look at a girl and think ‘wow she’s pretty’ but I’m not like turned on by boobs or something or I don’t immediately think about a girl in a romantic way, though it’s easier for me to make friendships with girls, I don’t know, I just get along easier with girls and talk to them easier. So in that way I sometimes thing I might be straight after all ... I’ve never had any romantic experiences with guys – because first of all I don’t know any gay guys and even if I knew any I probably won’t do anything since I’m not the kind of person who takes the first step, I’m pretty shy in that way – but when I see a guy I can think to myself ‘he’s cute’ and I think I'm attracted to guys sometimes (like when I see a picture of a cute guy on the internet or something), so I think I can see myself having a boyfriend rather than a girlfriend. Always as soon as the subject of being gay comes up, like in a conversation or on TV or something, I immediately become nervous and try to avoid things like that. I have no gay friends that I can turn to and I don’t want to tell anyone yet until I’m completely sure. I know my mom wouldn’t mind at all because she once asked me straight up if I was gay, I denied and then she said she wouldn’t mind if I was but I kind of ignored it. But still I’d rather just be 100% sure before I tell anyone. Thanks for taking the time to read this. Any advice or similar experiences would be welcome :icon_wink
Based off what you've written I'd say it's possible but not entirely conclusive. Finding guys attractive and imagining yourself with a guy over a girl is an indicator. Given that you haven't had any serious relations with either sex though I can't really give you a definite recommendation. A little self-exploring might be in order if you want to find an absolute answer.
I know porn isn't a sure indicator on sexuality, but do you find female genetalia gross? Or do you like it? And what about male genetalia? Could you see yourself living your life with a girl? Can you see yourself living your life with a guy? There's a quiz, called the Flexuality quiz. Quizes obviously won't always tell you what you are, the questions can really get you to think. I suggest you try it out. The Flexuality Test
Hi HappyGuy, it sounds like you're not worried or frightened at the idea you might be gay. You just don't know and don't know how to find out. Am I right? Maybe just give yourself time because there's no rule saying you need to find the right label for yourself. I take it you're still a teenager living at home so you've definitely got plenty of time to find out. just enjoy being yourself and see what happens. The label can wait.
Hey Goldensun, I don't have a problem with being gay like you said and you're probably right, I still have a lot of time to figure out. Thx for the advice! :icon_wink
