I came out as bisexual to some friends recently. And... not so much time after that, I didn't feel attracted to men anymore (weird and comic). Maybe I'm repressing my hetero-side because I want so much to explore my homo-side. Or maybe I'm not bisexual anymore? How is that possible? How can I accept my hetero-side? Why is this happening? What is happening? .-. Positive thing: friendship with males - with no risk/potentiality/fear of falling in love or feeling attraction and messing up everything - is so beautiful and... relaxing? It's like... brotherhood. I needed that. I need them to perceive me as a peer, as someone who will never fall in love with them and desire love/protection. And I want to love/protect girls. And venerate them as angels. 3) Or this is just a phase. .-------.
So you came out to friends and then whoosh your bisexuality went away? Why would it just disappear? Maybe you just didn't see someone you thought was hot? Even straight people don't look at every opposite sex person and become horny. Why do you want to "venerate girls as angels"? What does that mean?
I mean this is sort of what happened to me and yep I don't understand it. And now for the first time in my life after years of being a loser I am suddenly irresistible to men and am experiencing this thing of dudes pursuing me... I find it hilarious because I'm sure I'm very heavy handed with the gay vibes. Particularly I have one guy, a friend of mine, trying to pursue me. I wonder why I care so little about this new found luck though cos I feel like this is what I used to want at some point? But somehow it's really irritating to me right now. Its very confusing and I just wanna hide away haha. I definitely prefer having guys as peers not trying to protect me and getting to love and protect girls. I really do want to have beautiful girl to look after - guys trying to be super gentlemanly to me is just weird to me. My former bff used to say to me that he imagines me maybe sleeping with guys but having proper relationships with girls. I dunno if I see the sleeping with guys happening though cos I'm finding even kissing them sorta tedious and unpleasant. I dunno that could change with a guy I'm a bit more attached to. It just all seems ridiculous cos its not like I don't find guys quite attractive, and certainly all my life I had been interested in them basically until I considered an alternative (haven't got to the coming out tbh)
I can't give much advice on this, but that's probably a common thing for people that are attracted to more than one gender. I know that I personally do find the idea of getting a boyfriend very odd, even after all the struggle to accept that I'm not monosexual. Sometimes I do experience a "loss" of attraction towards girls and when I think that I probably won't like women again, it comes back. That's probably why people believe that sexuality can be fluid. I wouldn't say that. There are periods that you feel more attracted to guys, then girls... Maybe even people that do not fit in the binary genders. Gender non-comforming people can call your attention too. I see my changes in prefference as a normal simple change in what I want at a time, but of course, that's just my opinion on it. I believe it's normal to experiences these changes in your prefference.
I can relate. I remember when I used to identify as bisexual. After my coming out, I started to be less interested in men, or maybe it was because I didn't want to be interested in them, still not sure. So I decided to pick up the gay label and after some time, I met this lovely boy and now I'm in a relationship with him hehe ^^ so basically, what I'm saying is, I do believe that you really want to experience some gay love rather than straight but really it's up to who you meet. At least based off my experience.
It seems this happens to several bisexual people shortly after they come to terms with their sexuality. It certainly happened to me. I just posted this on another thread but it's relevant here so I'll post it here too: Shortly after I came out as bisexual, I began to find that I had no attraction towards girls. It was weird af and I began to feel stupid for fooling myself into believing that I wasn't straight (I identified as female at the time)... Then, after a week or so, my attraction towards girls returned, completely. Now I am 90% certain that I'm bi. The other 10% is wondering if I'm pansexual, but I don't mind either way really. You'll figure yourself out soon enough. Just take it easy in the meantime, and don't try to convince yourself that you're something that doesn't feel right.
It ebbs and flows for me as to whom I'm predominantly attracted to...so I consider myself 100% bisexual. I'm also super monogamous in attraction and action, so I remember it pretty well. one year - interested in a girl next year - interested in different girl following year - not interested in anyone year after that - interested in one guy the next year - sort of interested in one guy, not really interested in anyone the following year part one - interested in one guy the following year part two - interested in one girl this past summer - interested in one other girl briefly this fall - not interested in anyone...yet I wrote this out because, although yes, there were the occasion attractions to various people in between as well as dates and what not, but I really see my sexuality as something that has felt at one side of the spectrum almost exclusively at some points. Weird but true.
My sexual orientation is pretty fluid. Sometimes I'm more attracted to guys for a month or so and sometimes it's girls. I wouldn't worry too much about it if I were you
Thanks for the answers c: Change in orientation is something a bit destabilizing to me :/ but I'll try to take it as it comes. (It shouldn't matter. Orientation shouldn't be relevant to anyone, not even to oneself. It all should be normal, ordinary. If only the world were gender-blind and orientation-blind. Pride is ok, but I long for the day when pride of being queer will be as weird and nonsense as pride of having a long nose. Because it will be so - beautifully - ordinary and boring.) (SkyWinter, it wasn't "woosh" and bisexuality disappeared. It was slower. And… hm, about venerating girls. What can I say? They are the work of art of the universe. I want to serve them forever. They must feel loved. I don't want to court them all, obviously, I just want to be gallant.)
