hey there, i'm luke and i think that i might be gay, well ever since i was like 10 i felt something towards men like sexualy and romantically. But the thing is im really confused beacause i like men alot and i have both romantic and sexual thoughts about men, however like when i think of women in a sexual way i get really grossed out and like nothing happends, but i've had relationships with guys and girls and with guys i feel sexually in love and i feel that romantic spark, but with girls there's no sexual attraction and not really a spark but like , it's not like i hate them or anything and feel like i wanna break up with them, it's just tehres no spark so i don't know if i'm romatically attracted to women ,but i don't even feel romantically attracted to them, i tell if a girl looks nice or doesn't though but there;s nothing there and i wouldn't say 'oh look theres a hot girl' i just don't feel atraction towards them Ahhhhh help. Thanks for reading
Sorry for the bluntness but you literally just answered your own "help thread" in its contents... Like, if you think youre gay, and you know that you feel no romantic or sexual spark/connection with women, you are definitely gay if you do feel those feelings with men. If you know that you are gay, what exactly did you want help with? Do you want to not be gay or something
What the guy above me said. Don't force yourself to pursue a gender you don't want to. If you feel attraction to men then go with the flow and what feels natural, and you'll be fine
To me you seem pretty sure that you're gay. You don't feel attraction to women in any way, shape, or form besides "I can see how someone would be attracted to them" - and you feel strong sexual and romantic attraction to men. You don't need to completely hate women to be gay, just like a straight man doesn't have to completely hate men to be straight. Can you go into more detail on what it is that is confusing you?
Hi, Luke. I suspect that what's going on is that part of you knows you're gay, but another part of you is struggling with that. As we process any loss (in this case, loss of being straight), there are stages we go through... denial-anger-bargaining-grief-acceptance. And so as you process it, you are probably still somewhat in denial about it. This takes time, but from the sounds of it you're already on your way in understanding that these are the attractions you have. The next steps will be in learning to accept and love yourself as you are, since you can''t change who you''re attracted to.
