So here's my situation. I'm currently a freshman in college and have started to come to terms with the idea that I may be bisexual. I say "may be" because in all honestly I have no idea. The first time I can remember even fathoming the idea of being with a women was around my junior year of high school. Coincidentally a female friend of mine had just come out as pan and then proceeded to professed her love towards me. I didn't have feelings for her but I suppose that is what got the ball rolling in a sense. My friends have always been primarily girls. I've always felt more comfortable around girls than guys. I suppose I've thought that if you were friends with a guy then why not date him. But recently I've been thinking that maybe I'm more comfortable around girls because I'm attracted to them. I've never been sexual with either a man or women so I have no idea what I want. All I know is that I have usually felt like I could be more myself when I'm around other girls. Here's the thing...I know my mother, brother, and maybe my father would be completely supportive if I were to come out. It's the other family members that I'm worried about (grandmother, aunts, uncle, cousins). I've always loved to be normal. To blend in. If I were to come out I would hence forth be known as the "gay cousin" and that scares me to no end. I want to be happy. If I could 100% be happy with a man and only a man then I would choose that in an instant. But I don't know if I can be and that is utterly terrifying.
hey darling. i hope what i say is helpful in some way, but also i want to say keep posting on here, because there are some really great and supportive people on this site. i also wanna say that, and i hope it comes across the right way, but this is a time in your life to find out who you are, its okay that you don't know. thats so okay. i've been trying to figure myself out for years. i hope i don't overstep by saying these things. i have a family that would be supportive if i came out to them, but i also have extended family who would not be overjoyed...so to speak. right now, what i'm trying to do is to focus on myself and how i feel...because when i think about how other people would react i feel stuck and a lot of difficult emotions come up that get in the way of growing. so, again i'll say talk to some of the crowd who have been on this site a lot longer, but also as a new member of this site who is trying to figure out how to accept myself without the fear of others judgement....just focus on yourself right now...you don't have to know anything for certain in this moment, experience life and school and give yourself some grace. i hope that is helpful...i know it was a ramble of words. but know that there are people out there who hear you, youre not alone. we are here.
As a girl it's pretty natural to feel more comfortable around girls. But do you have feelings for them?
