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Very, very confused...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by CurdledMilk, Nov 3, 2016.

  1. CurdledMilk

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    Hi, I feel extremely confused about my sexuality. I sometimes feel only attracted to women, sometimes just men and sometimes both. I have even for a period of time really wanted to have sex with a transgender or hermadaphordite. I just dont know whether its hormones since I started puberty later than others normally do, or whether I am gay, bi or pans. I Would really like to hear what yyou lot think as i ddon't want to tell anyone i know. sorry for bad english I am on my phone.
     
  2. falconfalcon

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    well.. certainly sounds pretty bi/pan to me :wink:


    Don't worry about it - these things happen. Don't worry at all. Sexuality is not at all black and white, its really a rainbow!!

    Enjoy!!!!! :slight_smile:
     
  3. I'm gay

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    Hi CurdledMilk, (love the name!)

    First, welcome to EC and congrats on your first post! I know it's hard to put your feelings out there, not knowing what to expect. This is a community of every color under the rainbow. You're a part of that rainbow too! You are your own unique shade of color.

    I might suggest to you that you are attracted to people. Simple. If you want to apply a label to it, pansexual might fit. But for now, until you're really ready to settle on a label, based upon your description, you could just think of it as being attracted to other people, of all kinds and shades of color in the spectrum of light under the rainbow.

    And don't worry about it for now. You said you don't want to tell anyone that you know, so I'm assuming that you don't want to come out to anyone yet. Is that right? If so, then what's the use of a label if you're not going to tell anyone? That's why I think you can not try to choose one now and just see where your attractions take you. You'll figure it all out with time!

    Take care. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:
     
  4. SystemGlitch

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    A fair amount of people experience sexuality fluidly, especially if they are bisexual. This means that who they are attracted to varies over time, but they still have consistant attraction to those genders - it's mostly the intensity that varies. Sometimes someone may experience attraction to men only for a few months, then it will shift to mostly women for a few weeks, then it becomes equal for a year or so until going back to women for a few months... the attraction is still there, but the preference varies. Your experience to me sounds like that, so it'd suggest you are bisexual/pansexual. Only you can know for sure, though, so go with your gut instinct and let yourself be attracted to whoever you're attracted to. :slight_smile:

    In regards to transgender people - they are no different than other people of their gender identity. If you only felt attraction to women, and as a part of that you felt attraction to trans women, you would still be considered straight because they are women. Wanting to have sex with a transgender person therefore isn't an indicator of your sexuality (unless you are thinking of them in terms of their assigned gender, which is a whole other problem entirely). Please do try to take care not to pursue someone or try to have sex with them just because they are trans, however, because that can be rather objectifying and hurtful for them. :slight_smile:

    I hope this helps!
     
    #4 SystemGlitch, Nov 3, 2016
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2016
  5. CurdledMilk

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    Hi,
    Thanks for replying to me. You are all so friendly and supportive, which is a great trait to have. I'm regards to SystemGlitch don't worry, I would feel horrible going out with anyone just for sex! Some fantasies are definitely fantasy for a reason :slight_smile: . I do feel as if I am bisexual though I prefer men to women I do get attracted to both. I feel getting to know who I am is the first step of self acceptance which if possible even to come out to people at a future time. I hope we will be seeing a fair bit of me on these forums! Oh yes, I got my username from the contents of the fridge in my shed :wink: