OK hopefully I can make this a long story short. I have gone through period of my life where I think about having sex with women, but lately it's been a lot more intense. During those earlier times I thought maybe it was just a fantasy and didn't mean I was a Lesbian. I've never been really successful with dating. I've only tried dating men but there was only a few in my life I felt an attraction for, but for some reason I didn't get past the first date or couldn't get them to pay attention to me even when I asked them out. Other men have asked me out but I just wasn't attracted to them. I've never meet a women I felt a sexual attraction to, I do however notice beautiful women. I know a few lesbians but I'm not attracted to them either. Maybe because we don't have much in common, I don't know. I would love to just figure this out., but I don't feel it's right to use people just to find out about my own sexuality. I like to think that's why I haven't slept with a man too. It might be a whole different story if I ever meet someone I have a strong connection to. Fantasies or Real Life or both? I wish someone would just come into my life and make the whole thing more clear.
I think fantasies could be indicators, but I never really put too much focus on them. I could fantasies about guys, but when it came to reality I couldn't be with one. I always says following your fantasies. If you have fantasies about a certain guy or males in general...then try to fulfill it and see if that is truly what you desire. If you have fantasies about women then act it our and see if it truly what you desire. I think the only way you will really figure out your feelings is by acting them out and figuring it out as it goes. It's pretty similar to how people date others who they feel will be their ideal and then they figure out what they do and do not want from a life partner. All relationships are meant to teach us something or confirm something about self. I wouldn't see that as a negative. Life is about experiences. The other part of your post is never feeling attraction to any males or females. Could it be that you actually have a low libido? So sex is not really a major interest or major part of having a relationship. It really comes down to who do you want to share a huge aspect of your life with. A male or female? A life partner is going to be a major part of your life, huge influence in your everyday. Would you rather that be a male, female, or you don't care who you just care about having a strong connection with a person?
