I've felt more 'emotional romance' to women, none with men, but I've never been able to feel sexual attraction to either gender. I feel like kissing and stroking would be a difficult thing for me and probably an uncomfortable annoyance, and sex would be completely out of question. I wouldn't mind cuddling and lighter romance as much (actually, lovey talk and pillow confessions sounds beautiful.) I think a major reason for this discomfort is because I've never had a close tie with a woman in person (as opposed to online) and I consider myself somewhere on the demisexual line. Pics I've seen have definitely made me blush in the least, but I've never considered anything sexual with them... I have a strong desire to express my love though. I'm worried that I'm not actually attracted to women and am actually asexual, but I might be denying it because I really want to have an emotional connection with someone? I want to spend my life with someone who I care about more than anything else, but it's so difficult to find such a relationship without sex that I feel like I want to push that identity on myself for the sake of lowering my standards, since I don't want to be single anymore. :icon_sad:
Even if you are asexual, you can still call yourself a lesbian by romantic orientation. Some do it because It's easier. So sure. It's also possible you haven't met the right person if you consider yourself demisexual, as most "demis" still want and desire sex with people. Just under very limited circumstances.
I suppose it's easier as a labeling mechanism, but I'd like to know on some grand deeper level...I'm probably making it overly complicated. True- sometimes I forget that my feelings towards people differ GREATLY depending on my emotional attachment to them. I've had so little of that, it's almost as if I don't have enough information to decide no matter how much I wish I did. :dry: I wish I knew how to mingle.
I was kind of that way. I only feel sexually attracted to people I have an emotional connection with, so most of the time I come off as asexual to other lesbians. I have no sexual fantasies or urges toward women until we're actually together. And even then, my sex drive is pretty low. I could probably be fine with a minimal sex relationship (or maybe even sexless).
Same here. The thing that makes this a pain is finding a girlfriend is hard on one level, but finding someone who's okay with little to no sex or sexual actions at first (if not for the whole relationship) is in another ball field. I'm worried it looks like I'm not committing if I don't have any plans for physical intimacy.
