Hello, I am a 19 year old male and am having a issue or two when it comes to my sexuality. I am for the most part attracted to women 90% of the time but I don't get erections when fantasizing about them but only when in direct physical contact. (I workout 6 days a week not sure if this matters but hey ) On the other hand, if I go a week or two without masturbation or sex, I feel extremely attracted to pictures of men and espcially fit males online. That being said I live in a rural town with 5k people but I can't see myself with any guys around here and I just see myself with a faceless man. But when my urges are too much and I masturbate almost immediately after I loose all feelings towards men, if this didn't happen I wouldnt be confused but it does. I appreciate any detailed response thanks
You say you are attracted to women. Just not getting a full hard-on from fantasy alone does not mean you are not attracted, imho. Attraction is more than a growing d***, it has physical and emotional components. You become attracted to men after some time alone. How would you define that attraction: Are you only attracted to the abstract thought of a man, or are those detailed fantasies. Do these fantasies feel good in your gut? Do you feel curious, safe... All those are interesting details that might make everything more clear. Loosing interest in sex or sexualized fantasies after being sexually satisfied seems normal to me. I get it though, it can be a bit disconcerting. Several forum members recommend looking at what you think about during masturbation and how that feels (preferably without porn). Afterwards, a lot of rationalizations kick in, very much screwing up the picture. People are weird that way... If you are comfortable, I would recommend exploring yourself. You sound at least bicurious, so maybe there are some things you can discover that you like. Exploration rarely hurt as long as you stay safe and within your comfort zone. Masturbation, casual encounters ranging from cuddling, kissing to sex, all these are ways to get to know yourself. If sex with women (I assume you had some) feels good and satisfying, then you are probably not strictly gay. Just don't think about it too much. Being bi opens up possibilities, you don't have to date men just because there are attractions. But you could :icon_wink and remember: There is no correct way to be gay, bi or straight (or anything else). If you (and potential partners) are comfortable, everything is fine.
