I'm a girl (straight) and I think I like my best friend who is also a girl

Starting off, I have always identified myself asstraight. I've never wanted to be with a girl as it always pushed me away (I'm not homophobic, I just didn't see myself in a relationship with a girl).

However, I have met a girl 4 years ago who is now kinda one of my best friends. I think she's very pretty and funny and smart. She told me a lot of her secrets and asked for help. I've always been there for her. She even called me one of the nicest, kindest, helpful and best people she ever met. She always says that she loves me, but girls always do that so I don't think it matters that much.

The first time when I started talking to her was when she had a panic attack at one of the lessons. Before that, I noticed that she was very sad, as she didn't smile or talk at all. I messaged her and she said that I was the first to notice that, and that she is very thankful. That was the first step, and after that we became friends.

Everytime she has a problem, I tell her that I'm always there for her, and she said that she's always there for me too. I think that there isn't a day where I don't think about her. She is also my school, so everytime I enter the class I am looking for her, and as soon as I see her, I try to look away so she doesn't see me looking at her. We don't really talk too much in a real life, and it's not because of me, or her, or our friendship, but I'm started to be less talkative, since I moved to a different country (which is this the one that I live in right now - England). We talk a lot on Facebook, and she always likes my pictures as soon as I post them or as soon as she gets online. I helped her a lot, even in small things, and she said that she never met someone so kind and so friendlt like me.
Everytime she talks to me or looks at me, I get very nervous and my heart is beating a little faster than usual. I'm always looking on her social media to see if she posted any new pictures so I can like it immidiately. I remember when I was very sad when she moved to another seat when her best friend was not in, because I thought that she would like to sit next to me, but she didn't. I was thinking about this silly situation for like 2 days.

Everytime she posts a picture, I look at it for few more seconds and everytime I get a message from her, my heart beats faster and I'm very happy. She doesn't message me that much and she doesn't go on Facebook that much recently. She is a very very bad replier, so everytime I message her I'm always looking if these little three dots are appearing. I don't message her that much because I feel like I'm being annoying. I
There was a time where I didn't like her two pictures, and she said "you never like my pictures anymoreeeeeee ;( ;(!". I think that she is waiting for my likes and for me to see her pictures, but not just for me of course - I just think that she's expecting me to like that picture because she wants me to see her selfies.

She thinks that I'm one of her best friends, which is what she said to me a lot of times. There was one day when I was sitting in a library and I was focusing on the computer as I was doing my work, and then suddenly I felt someone touching my hair, like someone gently going through it with their hand as they walked past, and I turned around and it was her.

I think she might be bisexual, because she acts very weirdly with her other friend that is also girl. She hugs her a lot in a romantic way, she makes sexual jokes with her, and they both hold each other's hands quite often. I know that she loves boys too, because we had a lot of conversations about her and her problems with few guys that she had a crush on, and I was there to help her with that of course.

I've always been there for her, even when her best friend abandoned her for another guy, and she turned up to me as a first person to get advice from. I replied instantly as she messaged me, because I was waiting for her to do that. I'm literally waiting for her message every day even though I know she won't do that, because she doesn't go on messenger that often. I would literally stop doing everything that I was doing just to message her.

She also said that I'm gorgeous, and she compliments me alot on social media. She always says that I'm pretty, fit and "goals", and she always smiles to me, and even hugged me few times. This made me feel that she could have feelings for me, however I don't think that I'm a lesbian because I can't think about me kissing another girl, and perhaps even her.

She was playing with my pencil case while listening to the teacher, and I wasn't that far away from her, not right next to her, but in another desk that is close to her one, and she decided to suddenly take my pencil case and play with its zip, and then she looked at me, smiled and didn't say anything, as she put it back.

She's asking me very often about how I feel. She's always been there for me when I felt depressed. She gave me a lot of advices, and she could talk and talk just to help me out. She never messages me first, because she's a very bad replier (she even apologized few times and admitted that she is not a good replier). But one day, she asked me (in school) why I don't message anymore, and he said it in a very sad voice, as if she was waiting for me to message her.

There was one time when I uploaded a picture of me that I really liked, and she said that I am extremely cute. There was one time when I had a very cold room, and I had to put my jacket on as well as a hat and a scarf. I sent her a picture of me wearing these stuff (because I looked like I was preparing myself for winter) just to make it funny, and she said that I'm cute and adorable. She giggled a little and "Awww!! You look so cute!!".

Everytime I'm with my other friend, I want her to notice me, so she can see what I'm doing and I try to be funny in front of my other friend. I always pretend that I don't see her when I'm doing this. One day she heard me saying that I'm feeling that she is one of my best friends and she said that she was extremely happy to hear that, and that I'm amazing. She even hugged me after that.

When it was Christmas, I made her a Christmas card with the longest message ever. I've never wrote so much for someone on their Christmas card. She said she's going to keep it forever. When she received it from me, she hugged me and said that I'm the best person on Earth.

I know that this message is very long and you probably didn't read it all, but I really want to know your opinion. Me and her have so much in common, and we have the same type of humour as well as music taste. We basically do so many similar things, but it's hard to list them all now.

I want to be around her, but I feel very uncomfortable when I'm talking to her and when she's talking to me, I can't keep looking at her all the time because I feel very awkward and uncomfortable and my heart is beating fast.
In summary I want to know what you think, because I've never thought I'm going to have this feeling for a girl. I've never had though. I think she is very special and she might have a feeling for me, especially that I think that she is bisexual.

 

Sorry for many errors - I was "typing" it with my voice, as it's too long and I couldn't be bothered to type . Apparently, the "app" didn't recognize some of my words correctly. It's currenty 2AM here, so I'm also very tired

 

Can someone delete the whole thread please? I actually found an answer - I'm straight, as I would not want to kiss any girl, I think I'm just confused in this situation, but it doesn't mean I fell in love with this girl. Sorry! I still think your site is awesome and helpful, at least for others