hi, i'm very sure about my orientation: aromantic and homosexual. but i am still battling some issues and hope you can help me figure these things out. i am very sexually attracted to guys, i fantasise about having sex with a guy, i watch gay porn. but at the same time i never try to get to know anyone or to have sex. i'm not interested in dating or a relationship but i assume it would be easy to find someone to just have casual sex with. but for me that's a line that i'm scared of crossing. i don't know why. it would be no problem for me to hook up with someone online or in a club and just have sex with them. i often fantasise about doing it. in the end i never go that far and i don't know if it's because i'm shy or insecure or if i have underlying issues with my sexuality without realising. or whatever other reason there might be. it happens a lot that i imagine having sex with a guy and masturbate and it feels good. but then afterwards i feel disgusted. i don't know why. can you help me figure this out?
To me, it simply sounds like you may just still be a bit uncomfortable with your sexuality and intimidated my the thought of actually having sex with a guy. The reason you may feel disgusted after masturbation is for the same reason I just mentioned. It could be you are just coming terms with your sexuality still. But someone recently told me that what you fantasize about while masturbating can often have no correlation to your actual sexual orientation. I hope this helped!
i can't really figure out if it's that or something else. the concept of intimate physical contact is somehow frightening to me.
That might be something to talk to with a professional. Perhaps the sex isn't the problem, but the casual part is. Maybe you are deeply afraid of getting an STD or getting taken advantage of. It could be you are afraid that you will develop deeper feeling for your partner and they will not feel the same way... Those are all just guesses, but some things to think about. And all points a professional could help you figure out better.
