So I've liked girls since as long as I can remember. I used to identify as straight but I know now I certainly am bisexual... The thing is, I feel as if every day I'm becoming more and more gay. I've been ignoring girls I would normally be very interested in and instead finding guys more and more sexually appealing. Not to mention I don't ever find myself sexually fantasizing about women--only men. I guess my question is: Is it possible that I truly am becoming gay? My major conflict is that I really used to be very into women... Confused
It's possible and many gay people of both genders go through this. For example, I am a woman that identified as bisexual when I was younger. However, as I got older, I realized I really had no attractions to men at all anymore. You sound like you could be the male version of me.
Great! It's good to know someone has gone through the same thing:lol: I think much of what is holding me back as well is cultural norms / what these norms have made my mind think is "the right thing to do." I haven't had a working relationship with a girl in more than 4 years and haven't hardly tried to have one, so this could mean something of my true, deep-down feelings. I guess those feelings might just now be coming out now that I've identified them
I have been and still am going through these thoughts and feelings that I may be fully gay rather than bisexual. But the longer I wait to see how things develop, the more I'm seeing that while my active thoughts always go to men, I still find tomboys, or androgynous people, or masculine women attractive in many ways. So I think considering myself a form of bisexual is the fairest assessment I can give myself, rather than out and out gay. I think an aspect of why you may feel gay is that you were straight initially, but now that you have allowed yourself to show interest and attraction towards men, your mind and body want to explore these new feelings and desires more fully. And so all of your focus will turn to men automatically, but things might not always be that way. Perhaps you and I give these feelings a few months, and our thoughts could drift back to women, or things could even themselves out so that we think of both in an equal amounts. But I think the only way I'll ever be sure at this point is if I have the opportunity to actually have a relationship with both a man and a woman, or a few of either, and then determine how I feel about each.
Oh OK I see exactly what you mean! Every woman I have dated has been quite on the masculine side... My last girlfriend being bisexual.
Yes, I surely can relate to your feelings. I remember I used to have crushes on girls growing up and really only liking girls. Then, at about 12 or 13, I became fascinated with boys but still feeling as if I had a special attraction to girls as well, so I deemed myself as bisexual. Only up until last year did I actually understand myself to be gay, and I feel that this wait could have been because of a possible piece of subconscious denial, but who knows... Sexuality is very fluidic and doesn't always have a set preference. A label can just restrict you from totally being free and yourself. I believe that one is able to follow a certain path without any set labels, but by definition, if you are attracted to both sexes then that most likely means that you're bi, no matter if you feel 75% to 25% or 50% to 50%. You are able to identify as whatever you fell comfortable with. But to answer your question, yes it is possible that you are gay, but not necessarily that you are just becoming gay, but that as you grow up and move through life, you better understand yourself and your own sexuality. I'm sorry if this was confusing... but I hope I helped!
It ABSOLUTELY helped! Thank you so much I will let it all set in over time, and will certainly keep in mind that labels do in fact restrict! I'm so glad to hear that many others are going through the same thing as me(&&&)
