Hi, so I'm in a bit of a mental mess when it comes to my sexuality. I've been having a sexuality crises ever since I could remember, I just didn't know it could be labeled as a sexuality crises when I was like 10. I remember being like 10/11 and finding my mom's Victoria Secrets catalogue and feeling "things" in the pit of my stomach, as one does when they get turned on. I remember when it would come to having crushes growing up, I never really had them, I just sort of picked a boy who was conventionally cute and just say I had a crush on them. I remember girls on elementary school would hold hands with their friends but I would always get nervous and refuse to hold my best friends hand because I would get really nervous, anxious almost. When I was 12 I had a crush on one of my junior coaches who was in high school, and I know it's a crush now bc I know what a crush feels like. I remember finding porn for the first time and dicks ways freaks dme out. I just never felt anything for boys the way I did (and still do) feel about girls. One of my friends thinks it's because I haven't had very much experience with girls and that's the only reason that I find myself more attracted to them. But I honestly have no idea, and sometimes it takes someone else to tell me what's right in front of my face for me to understand (hahahahahha). I have kissed boys and one girl and the only way I can describe it is kissing boys has been like "ohhh" and kissing the girl was like "WOW" but the thing is that I think I've liked boys before, I notice when a boy is cute or hot, and I have had real true like feelings for 2 boys, grated this was a few years ago and I actually have 0 feelings for any boys, I'm starting to think I liked the attention the boys gave me and not the bos themselves? I don't even know if that makes sense!! . I guess, the point in this post is, am I a lesbian? I am starting to think so, but after hearing me out, what do you think? Thanks!
Only you can decide, but everything you described sounds like what a lot of lesbians experience, so you could be one. Maybe try identifying as a lesbian and see if it feels right? You don't have to be 100% sure to identify as one.
Hi there. There's nothing wrong with feeling like a mess. From what you have said you seem to be a lesbian. The best suggestion I have is to work out who you want to be with. You don't have to have been with a man or woman to know who you are sexually attracted to.
