What is it like to be attracted to only one gender?

I suppose it is best described as we feel like you feel when you see someone you are not attracted to, it just happens to be that for me I never get anything other than that feeling for males.

 

I have the same question sometimes, why is gender so important to some people, when it comes to falling in love. Then I think of things that turn me off. Like, I never found older people attractive. So, I guess it must be similar to that. I'm not attracted to older people, some people are not attracted to women or men.

 

Yeah exactly. It's not so much that gender is important to me, it's just that I don't find men attractive.

 

My sexuality is slightly based more on sex, so It's really just about being turned off by certain genitals, hormones, voices, and so on.

As far as trans people go, post-op trans women can still fall within the attraction area for me, but trans men do not because the hormones are too male.

In some ways, attraction to one gender is easier to understand if you put other preferences in account. I highly doubt every bisexual/pansexual person is okay with dating every single kind of person in the world. What if the partner was much older/younger? Or bald? Or never shaved/shaved everything? Or was overweight?

Same goes for mental reasons. What if someone smoked/did hard drugs? Or was religious? Or wanted BDSM? Or didn't want to live with pets?

Attraction to gender is no different as it can be both physical and mental (due to socialization). Some people simply are not attracted to what a different gender brings to the table.

 

It took me longer to figure out that I wasn't attracted to men than it did to realize I was attracted to women. I think it can be harder to notice the absense of something, especially when society expects it of you. I don't know if this is a great metaphor, but for me it's similar to not believing in a certain religion. I could study it, practice it, and go to worship, but I wouldn't feel anything, or have motivation to continue. That's how I was with men; I could go through the motions of a straight relationship, but there was no drive or desire there.

 

I've always been sort of questioning because I never actually solved what sexuality I was due to the fact that my gender sort of got in the way while I was trying to figure that out. I've always told people that I'm bisexual because I seem to have a slight attraction to males but I'm starting to quickly realize that I don't think I'm actually attracted to them.

it might be something else entirely I'm not 100% sure what's going on on that but I don't think I'm attracted to males. I'm hoping to eventually ask people about this later myself. But basically I guess you could say it feels just like it would feel for someone who is pan sexual instead of feeling attracted to all you feel attracted to one.

It's pretty empty I don't look at a male If it helps I know that my friends have mentioned I don't seem to look at males It's not something I think about to them don't seem to have that point where I'm looking at people not an asexual or creepy way just I don't seem to look at people and have that thought process of hey they look hot or cute. It's literally like everybody around me for example think somebody is cute and I just go okay and walk away without the care?

As for woman it's another story i can find them cute and i even sometimes have this very shy look when i meet one i wish i want to get to know or eventually ask out.
this was probably a horrible way of putting it but i tried.

 

I'm not attracted to ONLY one gender because I'd date women and non-binary people (I think my orientation says lesbian but that's outdated, I just identify as queer now). But I am not attracted to men so I guess that might help answer your question a bit. I really just have no desire to be in a relationship with men or have sex with them. The thought of it is unappealing to me, and I've tried it so many times, but it never worked out. I don't feel more than friendship for any of them. I don't desire them sexually like I do with women. When I see men I think are attractive, it doesn't really do much for me, it's just like looking at a nice painting. When I see women I think are attractive, I feel a lot more. Also, women are important to me, and when I date men, I feel tied down and unsatisfied because I can't be with women (I'm monogamous). As other people said, it's really just like not wanting to date or have sex with someone you're not attracted to, except it happens more frequently because it's an entire gender.

 

This question came up for me not long after I accepted that I am a trans woman. In my mind, being a woman means "Hey, I should be attracted to men!" I realise that's a stereotype, but in my mind that's how the logic went. Thing is, I've never been attracted to men and I'm still now. I can't see myself kissing a guy, for example. It just doesn't turn me on, not like kissing a woman does.

The gender you're attracted to is going to be different for everyone, I think, and the same goes for the reasons why you are or are not attracted to one gender over another. The way I feel is just me, you know?

 

Gender preference is more about sex. You can be turned on by feminine features, but not like masculine features. Or you can be turned on by masculine features, and not like feminine features. It's like apples and oranges. Some people like only apples. Some people like only oranges. And some people like both. For me it doesn't have anything to do with falling in love, I fall in love with personality, not appearance. It's just difficult for me to be attracted to men.