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Questions for Bi/Pan peeps

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Cinnamon Bunny, May 20, 2017.

  1. Cinnamon Bunny

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    Are there times where you find one gender more attractive? Like if you're dating a woman, do you find women more attractive or men less attractive? When you found out you weren't just straight, gay, or lesbian did you go overboard with exploring your new found sexuality?

    I've realized I'm attracted to women, and while I'm still attracted to men, women are just more appealing to me right now. I'm just not sure if this will be the norm or a phase. If I'm just excited at my new found freedom to fully indulge this side of my sexuality especially since I'm in love with a woman.
     
    #1 Cinnamon Bunny, May 20, 2017
    Last edited: May 20, 2017
    Jayrad likes this.
  2. WeDreamOfPeace

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    Absolutely. When I first realized I was bi, I thought it was more like girls with a hint of guys. Then I swung more the other way. This kept happening, but swung less to either way each time.

    Sexuality is always a little fluid. Now I have a mild romantic preference for women, simply because I feel better around women, can see myself with a woman easier than with a man, etc. But I tend to find even if my preferences seem to "wobble" over time, the average seems to be a little more towards women than men.

    Maybe it's heteronormativity, maybe it's just female company/nature, who really knows. But who cares :slight_smile: Love who you love.

    Long story short... yes, it's normal to fluctuate a little.

    Peace kittens hope and world domination with a side of fries.
     
  3. skittlz

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    Yup. Sometimes it shifts slightly based on my menstral cycle. (hormones? idk)
    But romantically speaking...not really I guess
     
  4. Secrets5

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    I find femininity more attractive. So that's more women than men. But I find feminine men more attractive than feminine women.
     
  5. EverDeer

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    Yep, this is also what made me used to struggle with accepting myself, as I thought the shifts either meant I was gay or straight, or I would worry that I wasn't good enough for anyone if my attraction shifted sometimes. I prefer masculinity, and I become emotionally attached to men / masculine people a lot easier than women, and right now I'm dating a self identified straight cis guy, though there will be shifts usually for several weeks or months at a time when I'll become really sexually attracted to women and wish I could be with one. Usually, my attraction runs short with them faster though due to the fact that I've never connected emotionally with a woman as well as I have with my boyfriend, we've been together a long time and he just knows me really well. Overall tho, I always have a preference to masculinity over all. I've learned that my shifts changing over time or my "unequal" attraction levels doesn't make me any less attracted to multiple genders, I think it's a pretty normal thing for someone to have preference.
     
  6. Cinnamon Bunny

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    Thank you so much everyone! This has been bugging me for awhile so I really appreciate it!
     
  7. usatanhani87

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    There's actually a word for this, it's called the "bi-cycle"
     
  8. CharacterStudy

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    Skittlz I've been wondering about hormone cycles too.

    Certainly with men I find that at some points I go for the blond, younger looking types, and at other times I go for really masculine, stubble, strong jawed types. When I was dating I'd find my attraction to the blond types wouldn't last very long, but the attraction to masculine men lasted significantly longer.

    Now I'm trying to factor in potential attraction to women too. I need to keep a diary. I need charts. Excel. Everything.
     
  9. JustABisexual

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    I believe it is normal to be attracted to one gender more than the other, sometimes your preference may change. Personally, despite whoever I am with, I prefer girls more.
     
  10. BothWaysSecret

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    It might be a bit different for me, since I'm a heteroromantic bisexual. I think for my situation, there's always going to be a draw to women, but recently I have been checking out more guys than girls. I think that's only because I haven't seen any girls recently that have caught my interest.