So, I identify as bi, but I have a very strong preference for girls. So much so that sometimes I just consider myself gay. So, it's like this. I am only attracted to fairly feminine guys, but I'm attracted to feminine and non-feminine girls, so it's not just an attraction to femininity. I wonder if maybe I just want to be attracted to guys because it's what I was raised to believe in? I'm just really confused, and I know my labels are all my own, but a little guidance from people who might be/were in the same position could help. Thanks for reading this and/or helping me out!
Hey! It's okay, this is a pretty normal mindset to have when you're bisexual. Unfortunately, we live in a society that creates pretty strict segregation between being gay and straight, even if we don't notice it all the time in our culture. I was assigned female at birth and for most of my life I thought I was straight- or more so, I didn't think I was, but I deeply wanted to be. Frankly, I think it's easier to just be one or the other because then you don't get people who question you or think you might cheat on them since you can just "pick whatever side you want". I appear to be a normal girl on the outside (even though I don't identify as such) and so most people assume in straight (since I'm dating a man right now) but no matter how happy that makes me, I've always felt as though I was still hiding some part of myself, or holding myself back in some ways... I prefer men greatly, but I can't help that I'm sometimes attracted to women as well. Maybe for you it's the same just flipped.... maybe you do feel as though you "have" to be attracted to men so you try to since being straight is "what's right" but I think there's two ways you could think about it...... even if you discover in the future that you'd much rather just identify as gay, that didn't mean being attracted to a few men was fake for you. I believe there are always exceptions to the rule..... and then, even if you are bisexual and just heavily prefer women, that doesn't mean you're faking anything or that you should just pick a side cause it's easier.... there's no comparing straight and gay, we're all just people, and how we feel and what we like is just who we are and not something we have to worry about fitting into some box. You might figure it out in the future, but try not to worry about society and just follow your heart. Being bisexual doesn't have to be equal or 50/50 attraction... if you have any attraction at all, even if it's like 90% girls 10% guys, then that's just fine and it's who you are.
I consider myself bi because I do prefer females, but I can be attracted to males as well. I prefer females... we are beautiful, soft... etc passionate, but my experience with guys have been a bit to fierce so I prefer females... when it comes to intimacy. I still believe I'm gay because I find men attractive and chemically ahem my body still reacts to them. ahem.
