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sexuality question

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by andrew23, Feb 13, 2012.

  1. andrew23

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    Is it possible for a gay guy to fall in love a girl? I loved this girl who I was on and off with for a few years. I have never felt that way about anyone, guy or girl, and can't imagine finding those kinds of feelings for someone again too easily. A friend told me that he didn't think I was gay because of how much I cared about this girl? Thoughts:confused:?
     
  2. Gravity

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    There could be a lot of reasons you feel this way towards her, many of which don't mean you're secretly not gay. I'm assuming you got involved with her before you came out to yourself? The simple fact of having a history with her, and having had those feelings in the past, can be a powerful draw, regardless of her gender.

    And finding those feelings, especially very powerful ones, is indeed rare. But you know what you want, so don't let anybody tell you otherwise.

    Try asking yourself a few questions: could you be happy just being close friends with her? Why, or why not? What do you think you would want, in an ideal world, from her? When you think of your ideal partner in the most perfect of all scenarios, what is that partner like? Maybe the answers to these or other issues will clue you in to something.
     
  3. Fisnou

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    May be you're actually bisexual? I don't think there's anything wrong with liking girls even if you've identified yourself as gay, although you might get asked to give an explanation...

    I know someone who came out as a lesbian a few years ago but she's now in a serious relationship with a guy. It happens. Do what feels right to you regardless of your label.
     
  4. Bedroom Hymns

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    I think it's possible. I don't really think falling in love necessarily has something to do with sexual orientation.
     
  5. andrew23

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    I was never physically involved with her really. It was just the romantic half of the relationship, holding hands and kissing. Being with her I always felt like I was torn in half, romantically I imagined myself with her but physically I would imagine myself with guys. To be honest, my ideal partner would probably be a girl, just I don't know if I could ever achieve that physical attraction.
     
  6. cscipio

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    Don't know if this is great advice or not, but you might consider being honest with her. It would remove some performance anxiety and allow for you both to level-set and see where things move.