Hi everyone...I'm not sure how to start, but I'll try to explain as best as I can. From the time I was 16 I have been questioning my sexuality. It all started when I noticed how much naked women turn me on, lesbian porn, I don't really look at the guy in straight porn etc. I ignored it cause I was in love with my then bf and liked having sex with him. Then we broke up and I decided to try being with women, I didn't like it. I really tried to like it, but it just didn't work =( I was so turned off, but in my head when I'm not doing it, I'm turned on...I think. Anyway, I'm now married to a man, who I love dearly, I love having sex with him, I don't really like going down on him though and the only thing I really like is when he penetrates me, that I love. For some reason one day I started to think I was a lesbian again and I started to picture him as a woman to see if I could get off faster and I couldn't, I even pretended he was a woman during sex and I was turning myself off...I had to go back to think of him desiring me to make me orgasm. I don't know, I'm really confused. I have a diagnoses of OCD if that helps and major anxiety issues. Why do I get turned on by naked women but when I'm actually with them I get turned off??
Honestly you sound like you're straight, and this isn't really worth your energy to worry about. You tried women, and you didn't like it. You keep trying women, and you don't like it. There could just be something about the aesthetic of the female body that turns you on, simple as that. It doesn't have to mean you want to do something with it, or have a relationship with a women, it really can be that simple. Some girls are pretty much completely straight but just really like boobs. Same with some gay guys.
Is it wrong that when I'm having sex with my husband that I picture some girl masturbating/lesbian porn or just some girl in general? Or the worst is pretending he has a vagina, I feel like I'm more into it, but not in a turned on way if that makes sense. I feel so guilty about this. I think I use this when I'm going down on him to make me stay turned on and get more into it, but when it gets down to him penetrating me I move all those thoughts away and only think of him. I don't know, I just get these feelings that every woman turns me on, but when I actually do something with them, it sucks.
I second that...you're straight. If you're turned off by the thought of being with a woman sexually then you're not bi/gay. There's plenty of straight women who get turned on my lesbian porn. It doesn't mean anything unless you can actually be with a woman in that way.
If you're just turned on from lesbian porn - it could be just because it's typically a lot more passionate than hetero porn. From what I've noticed at least. Most hetero is just filled with bad, fake moaning and it's just.. man I don't even watch it. And with the case of not looking at the man while watching hetero - it could be you're subconsciously placing yourself into the situation/imagining the woman is you and getting turned on? I dunno, just a thought. I'd say you're straight if you've been with women and disliked it - and disliked fantasizing about them as well. There's nothing really wrong with enjoying the female figure. You're absolutely allowed to like lesbian porn but not actually want to be with another female.
Im really confused. It seems like every naked woman I see turns me on, myself included. I could fantasize about another woman (not a real person - or someone I know) and become turned on.
