Hey everyone. This is my first time posting on EC. I need some help. I have been questioning my sexuality for a while now, and at first it never really bothered me. I always assumed that guys found other guys attractive...well. Clearly that isn't true. For my entire life I've always seen other guys as being attractive, but I also find girls attractive too. Most people would say that makes me bi, but I'm not so sure. I find guys a lot more attractive than girls and, to be honest, when I see an attractive girl it's more like I'm appreciating the fact that she is attractive rather than getting aroused. It's just not knowing that's killing me....I'm guessing I'm not the only one to go through this? I'm 18 by the way. Can anyone help?
So, do you mean you only appreciate women as beautiful but you have no sexual attraction to them at all? can you imagine yourself with a man or a women more?
I rarely have any sexual attraction to women, but it's not like it never happens. At this point I can see myself with a man more than a woman, but I'm not sure if it's that I'm convincing myself that I like men more. I guess what's confusing me the most is that it seems like I'm bi, but I find men significantly more attractive than women. Are there levels? Should I just call myself gay?
Welcome to EC! Judging just by your few lines of text, "gay" sounds like it might be correct. I personally find women attractive quite a bit. I even go to burlesque shows, which basically involve women taking their clothes off. I find them pretty, and sometimes even downright stunning. But nothing happens south of the equator, if you catch my drift. But when I see a guy taking his clothes off, that's a whole different ball game. Lex
To answer your questions about there being different levels of homo/heterosexuality. The kinsey test is frequently used in psychology to measue sexuality, though I have a friend who couldn't be classified on it. Here is an online version. Kinsey Scale Test
Do you mean when you see a girl in public you occasionally get aroused and start thinking about doing sexual things with her? Have you felt aroused in the presence of women before?
To me, that part in bold sounds like you're gay. Most people who describe their experience that way eventually identify as gay. And it's a very common way that we see people describing their experience. Welcome to Empty Closets!
Thanks for your answers everyone! I really appreciate it. Basically I very rarely want to do sexual things to an attractive woman, even though I realize that she is attractive. I guess I always thought that a gay guy wouldn't even find any woman attractive. Apparently that's not true? I guess what's most confusing is that I do recognize both genders as being attractive to some degree, which is the only thing that's stopping me from calling myself gay. I know I have to answer this question myself, but i really appreciate your feedback!
Do girls ever make you horny? Does an attractive women grind your gears so to speak? Maybe you're feeling some sort of abstract arousal that isn't particularly indicative of a particular gender. Sometimes we can get a passing horny thought that lasts for less than 5 seconds and could cross gender lines. But we know in reality we don't desire to do that.
