1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Gay, Bisexual or...?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Modernity, Mar 4, 2013.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

  1. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Hello there.

    Recently i've been trying to accept that i'm gay - with the help of a therapist. I'm still scared of 'coming out' and i can't really tell if this is just a phase.

    Anyway my issue is, a guy has asked me on a date, i think he's hot - but i still can't decide whether i'm going down the right route, or if i'm taking it too fast. I've only really been more accepting of my sexuality for a few weeks - and no one close to me knows about this.

    Should i wait, until i'm entirely sure? Or shall i go on the date and see what goes?

    Thanks
     
    #1 Modernity, Mar 4, 2013
  2. Valkyrimon

    Valkyrimon
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Messages:
    889
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wales, UK
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I'd say go for it! Even if it turns out to be not your thing, it'd be a good way to explore yourself and perhaps help you accept yourself more.
     
    #2 Valkyrimon, Mar 4, 2013
  3. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Sooo confused! Either it'll go really well, and be self affirming. Or it'll just be really weird for both of us
     
    #3 Modernity, Mar 4, 2013
  4. Kyubi

    Kyubi
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 19, 2012
    Messages:
    136
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Jo'burg S.A.
    I also think you should go for it!!!
     
    #4 Kyubi, Mar 4, 2013
  5. Ianthe

    Ianthe
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2011
    Messages:
    2,760
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Oregon
    Go ahead and go out with him, but be honest about where you are with things.

    And keep it a low key kind of date. :slight_smile:
     
    #5 Ianthe, Mar 4, 2013
  6. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Should i just tell him then? I've never actually met him before, only chatted a few times online - i think he's far more experienced than me!
     
    #6 Modernity, Mar 4, 2013
  7. Ianthe

    Ianthe
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2011
    Messages:
    2,760
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Oregon
    How did you meet him?
     
    #7 Ianthe, Mar 4, 2013
  8. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    on ********** - i was curious, so i made a dating profile
     
    #8 Modernity, Mar 4, 2013
  9. Convoy

    Convoy
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2013
    Messages:
    369
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    WNY
    I would go but don't rush into bed and expect everything to go flawlessly, thing's will be a bit awkward the first few times you meet guys so just don't get your hopes up too high so that you can get disappointed, epically if this is the first time your experimenting with guys.

    You've got to give it a chance, but If you really don't feel ready for anything then don't do it. There's always more guys, girls and time to work things out.
     
    #9 Convoy, Mar 4, 2013
  10. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    I think i will go, probably from the mindset of 'having a chat as friends'..
     
    #10 Modernity, Mar 4, 2013
  11. Ianthe

    Ianthe
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2011
    Messages:
    2,760
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Oregon
    I think that's a good plan.
     
    #11 Ianthe, Mar 4, 2013
  12. Modernity

    Modernity
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2013
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    The only thing is, i still haven't 'come out' to anyone.. so it kinda feels like I'm trying to run before i can walk lol
     
    #12 Modernity, Mar 5, 2013
  13. RavioliFaceMan

    RavioliFaceMan Guest

    I just think the point is that you should just do what you're comfortable with. If you feel like you want to date this guy, then do. Just do not allow yourself to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with. If he tries to kiss you, do not be afraid of rejecting him. It may help to tell him your position if you do decide to start seeing him; that way, he will know what your relationship can become, and if it's not the kind of thing you want, he'll call it quits there and then.
     
    #13 RavioliFaceMan, Mar 5, 2013
  14. SaleGayGuy

    SaleGayGuy
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2013
    Messages:
    612
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Manchester, UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    You said “The only thing is, i still haven't 'come out' to anyone.. so it kinda feels like I'm trying to run before i can walk lol” . I would say to you that you can’t come out until you know who you are, and going on this date may help you in understanding yourself.

    Sale Gay Guy
     
    #14 SaleGayGuy, Mar 6, 2013
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)