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Really REALLY stressed out...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by PurpleRain, Mar 10, 2013.

  1. PurpleRain

    Full Member

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    Location:
    Skyrim... I have no life, and enjoy it. :D
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I've been doing a lot of thinking about college lately because I'm going this year and I just realized how stressful it's going to be... I have to be roomed with a guy and I'm afraid of that for obvious reasons, and I just don't know that I can handle having to explain myself to a roommate. Especially since the college I'm going to is known for it's religious affiliation. Not only that but I'm going in as a music major and I really need to be able to sing in the female register if I'm going to transition and I've heard that vocal chord surgery, which I'll probably have to have because my voice is so deep, actually takes a few notes off the higher range as well... It's really all kind of depressing... :frowning2: Any advice is appreciated, thanks in advance...
     
  2. JBWat

    JBWat Guest

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    Location:
    Alabama
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    First of all, you need to examine what you can live with. Unfortunately, none of your options sound ideal, but when making the choices of how to live, you need to look at yourself and those around you. Here are some questions you might ask yourself:

    1. Which option is going to cause you the least turmoil? There are a series of tradeoffs here. Like if you continue your transitioning, sure you might have to explain yourself to people, but isn't that better than being depressed over not being yourself?

    2. Will your current gender state affect your future goals? Are you going to be bullied at university, or kicked out of because of the religious factor? Sometimes we have to make sacrifices now in order to have to a better life later.

    3. Is it absolutely necessary for you to be a soprano to make your transition? I knew a wonderful woman who had the most beautiful tenor voice. She could not have sung soprano to save her life, but that didn't make her or her voice any less great or feminine.

    These are just a few questions, and I'm not trying to pressure you one way or another. You need to decide what's best for you, your mental and physical health, and your future. I wish you all the best! (*hug*)
     
  3. Theodora

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    First of all it's so cool that you're a singer. :icon_bigg I've always been really anxious about singing in front of anyone.

    From what I've read about vocal surgeries in general though I think you're better off as a musician if you use a singing coach instead of surgery. The risks might be worth it for someone else but if your voice is being used as an instrument you really don't want to lose your range or tone.

    And don't get depressed about your starting point, I knew a (cis)female blues singer who had a waaaay deeper singing voice than me and it was amazing. Very impressive, powerful, and sexy, and definitely still came across as a woman singing. You're a music major so I'm sure you'll do fine with the voice stuff. ^^

    I can't help with the roommate thing unfortunately so I won't comment. :dry: I do hope you find someone to live with who is understanding.
     
  4. PleaseHelp

    Regular Member

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    Voice training isn't as hard as people make it out to be. Look up CandiFLA on YouTube. I used her videos to train myself, and I have a pretty convincing girl voice. Don't let your real voice detur you, I'm a bass so I can see where your fears would lie, but you should be fine ^_^ good luck!
     
  5. PurpleRain

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Skyrim... I have no life, and enjoy it. :D
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Thank you all for your replies it really helps. See the thing with the voice is I've already got the vocal range of an alto in chest voice, and I've trained my voice to the best of my abilities but my speaking voice is so deep. Like vocally I'm a tenor - bass, but my speaking voice is so deep and has been since 4th grade. It's the only thing that was heavily affected by puberty for me. It's so deep that it drags everything down with it so I can't make my voice female no matter how hard I try. Even though I have such a high range it's still clearly male because of it. It drives me crazy... :frowning2: