IDK What's Going On...

I've always thought I was straight until this year. I've always liked boys and I've never really looked at girls sexually. Like sure, sometimes I'd look at their boobs and make comments to myself like "Wow... those are big" but I thought all of my friends did that too so I never really thought about it.

But this year I've started listening to Adam Lambert (who is openly gay) and I feel like...I don't know... it influenced me or something. I find Adam incredibly sexy, as well as his boyfriend and guitar player. They're all guys, so I wasn't worried. I like Bill Kaulitz (who isn't gay, but has a very adrogynous style), I also find him sexy. And then the list kind of goes on about guys I find that are sexy; but all of these guys wear make-up/are adrogynous/ are gay. I never saw it as a 'sign' because they're all boys, but my friends pointed it out and they kind of joked about it like "Yeah,you like all the gay people so you're obviously going to turn out a lesbian too." I looked past it for awhile but they ALWAYS bring it up. Even my parents think that all of the people I like look like girls/are girly. My parents keep asking me if I'm a lesbian and I keep saying no; but now I'm not sure.

I've gotten a sudden interest in drag races and movies/TV shows with homosexual content. Like, I've recently been watching the show Queer As Folk, and I find that I totally dig the guys, I think they're sexy and at the lesbian scenes I don't feel as turned on, but I still feel SOMETHING. And I've searched up and watched gay/lesbian porn and I liked it. I've watched straight porn too, and I like it as well. I don't see much of a difference, although I do prefer the gay/lesbian stuff I will admit.

Everyone thinks I'll be a lesbian, and like I said, I keep denying it, but now I seriously think that maybe I'm not straight... I don't think I'm a lesbian; I like boys WAY too much for that, but I think I could be bisexual. I have nothing against LGBT, so if I was certain that I was bi I wouldn't be afraid to say it, EXCEPT for the fact that I feel like I'd get a bad name... especially if I went out saying I was a bisexual rather than lesbian.

Anyone in grade school must know what I mean; especially if you're a girl. If you're a girl and you say you're a bisexual; you're looking for attention. Nobody believes you. I don't want people to think I'm looking for attention because I'm not, but I don't want to hide it if I ever come to the conclusion that yes, I'm not straight. It bothers me because guys can say they're bisexual and everyone would believe them, but as soon as it's a girl everyone thinks you're searching for attention.

I'm just really confused. I'm seriously considering the bisexual thing, because I'm either bisexual or straight; I like boys. I know that. I know that as a fact. But I think I like girls too... I've fantasized about getting it on with my best friend more than once. I've considered a sex change. I think I'm bisexual, but I'm still debating.

Thoughts?
Can anyone help me?
If you need any more information, just ask me, I'll be a completely open book on this forum, I'd just really like some advice.